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UNsoulmated 2 (or How to Survive a Divorce By Burning A New Path For Yourself)

Calvin Maximilian

NOTE: Days # 237+ are available on this Soundcloud profile. To listen to past episodes, Days # 1 -1 236, go to https://soundcloud.com/user-808459452 .



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Day 291. Today my ex casually drops the information that she is getting married in the coming week in a text. And I am ecstatic that this is finally happening. Also, my old Pen Pal sends me a link to an article about my ex-sister-in-law that displays how stupid the idiot is in her obsession for attention.
Day 290. During my recent conversation with my brother, he asks me why I am not dating and then challenges me saying that I need companionship. I go over why I disagree and am a bit annoyed that he keeps insisting he knows better.
Day 289. I am awoken suddenly at 4:00am by a call from my mother needing me to rush my father to the emergency room. Things don't get much better throughout the day but the comedy gods are smiling down on me as the day is saved by a successful night of comedy.
Day 288. The biker rally comedy gig turns out to be a bust but I'm cool with it. I got a chance to peek into a culture I had not been involved with before and it helps me understand those who enjoy it and less critical of cultures that I am not interested in.
Day 287. Some Facebook activity brings back memories of a girl I had pursued at one time. I had not thought of her in ages so seeing her name suddenly woke that side of my brain that had stored her memory away for quite some time. I revisit the time I had pursued her.
Day 286. Men today are under the microscope, but instead of fighting it and trying to defend ourselves, it would be better if we can just face the fact that we have some really crappy representatives out there and do what we can to separate ourselves from them instead of defending ourselves, which makes it worse.
Day 285. I am put in a position in which I may have to tell other comics that their material or their stage presence isn't good enough to have them performing at the comedy club I have been working at, and I am not looking forward to having to do that.
Day 284. Word-of-mouth of my success as a stand-up comedian is getting around, and it is bringing back all of the lonely single divorced ladies reaching out to me to "be friends" and it is seriously weirding me out again.
Day 283. As I had suspected, there does seem to be some resentment building between some of the comics towards the idea of some comics getting work while others do not. I have not heard of any backlash towards myself yet but there is some criticisms of the kinds of comics the club I have been working for books.
Day 282. Another great couple of nights emceeing for some great headliners, I get some important tips from the professional comics about networking and how that will land me more work down the road. Also, my ex makes a request that I agree to but wonder if it was the right thing to do.
Day 281. I had thought I was done with having to think about the crazy white guy I had to block on Facebook but now people are coming forward to inform me of other heinous things he has done and some of it is surprisingly psychotic.
UNsoulmated 2 (or How to Survive a Divorce By Burning A New Path For Yourself)
Sep 21, 2018 Calvin Maximilian
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Day 280. In the continued saga of me and my love/hate relationship with some choice white acquaintances, one representative proves that he is truly the poster child for the very version of the white man that the media wants us to hate.
Day 279. I revisit the importance of separating your feelings from your actions when a group of friends turn their aggression towards me due to misinterpreted understanding of my position on viral video of a white male making what appears to be a White Power hand gesture.
Day 278. My daughter tells me once again that she does not love NP Douche. This makes me wonder how he feels about this. It also makes me wonder what he could be doing to make her not love him. Also, I address the difficulties of dating for men vs. women based on a comics point of view of the situation.
Day 277. As more opportunities present themselves, I start to feel the pressure of expectations and follow-through. Although I want to stay on this path and feel like I am here for a reason, I had not expected things to move as quickly as they have and am starting to be a little stressed by it.
Day 276. I ponder the complexities of what it will be like to plan long-term travel around my joint custody of my children, which leads me to thinking about how to fulfill my journey in life around others who are not ready to give control over to the grand scheme.
Day 275. Resentment is usually considered a negative emotion but after much consideration, I have come to the conclusion that some forms of resentment exist as a form of protection for yourself.
Day 274. I used to be quick to defend the actions of "white people" as a show of support for my Caucasian wife. But now that I am divorced, I find that I can easily just sit back and let people sort out their own stupid mistakes and not have to get involved anymore.
Day 273. Norm MacDonald makes a statement regarding the #MeToo movement that causes a lot of backlash and a Tonight Show appearance cancellation. How Netflix chooses to react to the controversy may pave the way future networks and companies handle these kinds of situations moving forward and how this would play into my life.
Day 272. As I become more involved in the local comedy scene, I am learning that I need to remember to be open-minded to the possibility that I am only hearing one side of some stories. This will not only allow me to have a broader view of the world around me, but also helps me to not miss out on good opportunities solely based on one person's (or multiple persons') point of view.
Day 271. In response to some feedback I have gotten, I elaborate more on my decision to end my relationship fully with my Lost Soulmate. Where some see it as me giving up on her, the truth is I have to do this in order to not give up on myself.
Day 270. My train of thought leads me back to the night I had contemplated ending it all and the motivations as to why I climbed up onto that stool and the motivations that brought me down off of it.
Day 269. I get to have a lazy day today, which is nice. In doing so, I am able to think about life's lessons and remind myself the most important thing about healing, and that is just doing it.
Day 268. The Colin Kaepernick Nike ad controversy is something I wanted to stay out of but thanks to a Facebook troll, I get pulled into it and have to address my position on it.
Day 267. I have a successful night of hosting a professional gig and look forward to tomorrow night's show. In the meantime, I run into a situation where three attractive women flirt with me and my mind instead wanders over to an email I receive from my Pen Pal.
UNsoulmated 2 (or How to Survive a Divorce By Burning A New Path For Yourself)
Sep 7, 2018 Calvin Maximilian
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Day 266. This seems to be the week of women who I thought were in my past resurfacing all at the same time. Some of it good, some of it not so good. All of it is unexpected and I am not so sure what all of this means and how it will play into my future.
Day 265. I get an unexpected text from my ex that is a positive milestone in my journey, but the cautious side of me wonders what prompted the message and if I should be concerned about a hidden agenda.
Day 264. I reflect on the idea that we are all programmed to react to the terrible things that can happen to us through humanity's freewill and when we are able to embrace that we have that freedom to influence our future, then the road up ahead doesn't seem too dark.
Day 263. As I prepare for my first paid hosting gig this coming weekend, the club owner has an odd bit of censoring he wants to enforce with my act. Also, I talk about a hypothetical scenario in which one of my former in-laws could end up very annoyed by the prospect if it were to ever happen.
Day 262. Some continued communications from my Lost Soulmate has me thinking about how her friendship may not be worth the trouble when I already have someone in place willing to be the friend I have been looking for in these lonely days of being divorced.
Day 261. I do a midday check in because of the number of odd happenings in the first half of my day from my Lost Soulmate explaining to me how she plans on joining an evangelical group which sounds more like a cult, and my 5-year old daughter telling me how she saw NP Douche's wiener.
Day 261.B. In support of continued Asian presence in Hollywood, I do my part in supporting the movie SEARCHING, which has more riding on it than the impact CRAZY RICH ASIANS had and I explain why. Also, my dinner not-date with my old Pen Pal is a refreshing change from the conversations I have had with my Lost Soulmate.
Day 260. I reflect on my Lost Soulmate's accusations of the kind of people I will be interacting with if I continue on my comedy path and choosing to engage in sinful ways with the likes of comedy clubs and bars. In addition, a first for me in a long while, I meet someone who ends up completely capturing my full attention and I can't seem to figure out why.
Day 259. Today, I took my son in to be treated for his allergy issues and it turns out he is VERY allergic to many things but the cost to have him treated is way out of my budget. My ex, though, does come through showing the good side of her I don't get to talk about as much. Also, I come up with an idea that, if taken seriously, could score me a second movie role for the coming year.
Day 258. I am reminded of some of the things my ex said to me in her scolding letter about my behavior online and onstage. One point she made has me wondering if she has more surprises for me coming up in the legal sense if I ever am successful.
Day 257. In recent news, further development in the Asia Argento sexual misconduct story that may bring her down. Meanwhile, Louis C.K. makes a sudden public appearance and the public reaction is very mixed. How does any of this apply to my life?
Day 256. Having had opportunity to work more closely with the comedy club owner, I am starting to rethink my previous perceptions of the man and am wondering if I was a little misled by the other comics regarding doing business with him.
Day 255. I knew my Lost Soulmate would eventually bring up her view on Christianity again but I didn't expect it to be this soon, which leads to the potential of things ending again, sooner than expected. Also, some recognition from last night's comedy performances brings up old performance anxieties.
Day 254. I had a successful comedy set opening for a long-time professional, who later gives me inspiring feedback that helps me know that I am on the right path. Also, I get to try out a method of interacting with girls that I had not done before and it proves also successful.
Day 253. What appears to be efforts from my Lost Soulmate to mend our relationship (although I am still very wary), our dialogue today shows the difference the two of us perceives the idea of giving over to God control of our lives, where I see it as complete control where I don't think about what I no longer control, whereas she focuses on all the examples of her how she is giving over control.
Day 252. Today ends up being a crazy day with me being spread thin over my Lost Soulmate's sudden resurgence of involvement in my life and my ex-wife lecturing about how I should be acting as someone who is divorced.
Day 251. One thing I am starting to hear about are the vermin of the underbelly of the comedy circuit and I am beginning to see how different people are responding to these different elements of the comedy world. This helps me use my own personal way of managing my feelings to an advantage over some of these club owners.
Day 250. Having had time to process the sudden reappearance of my Lost Soulmate back in my life, I am able to sort through all the possibilities of what this means and this helps me better plan how to move forward with this new dynamic in my journey.
Day 249. I finally do a set of one-liners on stage and the set is a huge success. This really helps me feel more confident about doing one liners. But my high from a great performance is interrupted when I suddenly get a phone call from my Lost Soulmate.
Day 248. Breaking news of one of the #MeToo movements founders, Asia Argento, having potentially paid off an accuser of her sexual assault misdeed against the accuser, brings up whether or not we need to restructure how we react to the slew of accusations that have come forward since the movement began.
UNsoulmated 2 (or How to Survive a Divorce By Burning A New Path For Yourself)
Aug 19, 2018 Calvin Maximilian
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Day 247. I reflect on those who blindly took my ex's side and were even a little arrogant about their decision to do so. A part of me chuckles at the idea of how many of them were all "TEAM EX-WIFE" not knowing how much my ex really dislikes them.
Day 246. I now understand the reasoning behind why grandparents tend to spoil their grandchildren. This understanding will remind me to try and be more patient with my grandparents when they do it.
Day 245. The new romantic comedy CRAZY RICH ASIANS is considered a milestone for Asians in cinema and is receiving rave reviews. So why am I skeptical about all the attention this movie is getting?
UNsoulmated 2 (or How to Survive a Divorce By Burning A New Path For Yourself)
Aug 16, 2018 Calvin Maximilian
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Day 244. I suddenly realize that I have also reached a personal growth milestone in how my mind is aging and in doing so, I need to consider ways to keep me sharp and young at heart.
Day 243. Friends still insist on giving me updates on my ex, which I try to dissuade them from doing but today's news does have significance in my journey of healing. Additionally, I voice a concern of mine that will very likely not happen but I have to stay aware just in case.
UNsoulmated 2 (or How to Survive a Divorce By Burning A New Path For Yourself)
Aug 14, 2018 Calvin Maximilian
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Day 242. I get a compliment tonight from a woman that ends up being a bit of a concern for me because of my aspirations to be a versatile comic, which includes being able to laugh at myself as a visually ridiculous presence.
Day 241. About this time last year, my then-wife and I read that Hollywood darling couple Chris Pratt and Anna Faris were getting a divorce. This shocked us. A Few months later, we became them in that we shocked all of our friends in the same way. PLUS: If Anna Faris would be willing to go on a date with me, I will happily end my dating ban to do so.
Day 240. An oversight may be the reason my ex seems to know more about my current life than she should, but my possible spy did not fully cover her tracks, so I think I have eliminated the culprit. Also, I realize why I had been in a funk of late and am now working on resolving that issue.
Day 239. I philosophize a bit on what it is I believe God really wants us to be doing down here on Earth. And it isn't what the very vocal "Christian" community would want me preaching but I feel very strongly about this belief, so much that if my Lost Soulmate knew I was preaching this, she would definitely not want me in her life anymore.
Day 237. I continue to dip my toe into new waters with some low hanging fruit and some long view prospects. Also, someone from my past also suddenly reappears with no explanation and I'm curious what this could mean.
Day 238. Already having a not so hot day, I get an unexpected call from a debt collector regarding one of my ex's student loans. I have never been fond of the way debt collectors could be and this guy did nothing to change the negative view I have towards them.