Next time you go for take-out, make sure you check the bag for a red star. The red star doesn't mean you're the most special customer of the day. It means that someone at the restaurant thinks you're a flaming bitch. The red star means that every employee in the restaurant should j**z in your bag, empty out used plates into your food and drop a pubic hair in the bag as they pass by.
This material may be protected by copyright law (Title 17 U.S. Code).