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tv   The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon  NBC  November 30, 2016 11:35pm-12:38am EST

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another listening post has gone dead and the one closest to the wormhole is detecting a ship. increase in neutrino levels-- something's coming through. shields fully charged. weapons ready. the wormhole's opening. on screen. o'brien: it's the defiant.
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trouble. father? ahh... have you been waiting long? not long. you should've come into the shrine. no, i don't think so. so, where would you like to have dinner? forget about dinner. go back to your quarters and pack your things. there's a ship leaving for cardassia in the morning. i want you on it. ( sighs ) i've just learned there's a dominion fleet headed for the wormhole. this place is not safe any longer. but, father, i'm not sure that i... ziyal. there's nothing to discuss. i'm not going to let any harm come to you. now, i think you'd better get ready to leave. hm?
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they have been scanned. they have no weapons and their identities have been confirmed. very well. you will be sheltered in barracks six. you are free to move about the compound but remember, beyond the atmospheric dome there is nothing but airless vacuum and barren rock. or an instant and you die. we'll keep that in mind. i've been waiting for another... klingon.
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general martok. ( groaning ) enough! it's over. but for you it's just beginning. general. huh? ( groans ) do i know you? i am worf, son of mogh. yes, i've heard of you. how long have you been here? two years. aren't you klingons supposed to kill yourselves when you're taken prisoner?
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or hope of escape. if you... are worf... then you must be garak. he said you would come. tain. worf: what is wrong with him? really? there are many people who'd say he doesn't have one. he was convinced that you would come. he knew i had no choice. tain. tain, i'm here. my message... it got through? it did. where are the others?
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just commander worf and me. you allowed yourselves to be taken prisoner? i taught you better than that. living on that station has dulled your wits. and that's it? after i've come all this way after all i've been through? that's all you have to say to me? what do you want me to say? i want you to say "thank you, elim. "your loyalty is most gratifying. but i couldn't count on you, could i? all you've done is to doom us... both. ( sighing ) sorry i'm late. what's he doing here?
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the dominion invasion of the alpha quadrant will affect cardassia every bit as much as it's going to affect us. besides, we need all the help we can get. the dominion picked a perfect time to invade. the cardassian and romulan fleets are in shambles and between the klingon war and the recent borg attack starfleet's spread pretty thin. then we're going to have our hands full. there are at least 50 dominion ships headed our way. they could just be the first wave. how soon can we expect reinforcements? at maximum warp, two days. dax: not soon enough. what help can we expect from cardassia? my ship and my crew are at your disposal. one ship. things are looking brighter. right now there's no way we can beat the dominion. our only hope is to prevent their fleet from entering the alpha quadrant. you're going to destroy the wormhole? it's always been a final option. i'd hoped to never use it.
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professor lenara of the trill science ministry has come up with a way to seal the wormhole without damaging it or harming the prophets. but bajor will be cut off from the celestial temple. history has shown whenever the prophets want to communicate with bajor they find a way. but... it's either that or bajor becomes the first dominion target. we'll have to remodulate the deflector grid frequencies and rig a phase-conjugate graviton beam. you and dax start working immediately. what about worf? odo: if we close the wormhole he and garak will be trapped in the gamma quadrant. casualties... of war. we have 36 hours to find their way home. let's hope they can make it.
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the dominion used to mine ultritium here. there was no dome. each one of these barracks had its own life-support system embedded in the walls. and tain was able to modify that life-support system and create a subspace transmitter. yeah. there's a crawlspace just behind those panels. he spent hours in there working every day for months on end. cardassians-- ( chuckles ) they're clever people. especially that one. but in just a few days, at best he'll be dead. then it is up to us they're releasing him from isolation. good. who?
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b-negative, in case you were wondering. well, it appears we are who we seem to be. if the blood screenings can be trusted. it's all we've got. at about the others? have they been tested? everyone except that breen. no blood. when were you brought here? over a month ago. i was attending a burn-treatment conference on meezan four. i went to bed one night and woke up here. the same thing happened to me except i was hunting sabre bear out on kang's summit. little did i know i was being stalked as well. and now i'm told the changeling that replaced me
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it is a grave dishonor. you are not to blame. i can only imagine what my replacement is up to. we must escape and warn captain sisko before that changeling carries out his mission. creating a precisely modulated graviton field to seal the wormhole won't be as easy as lenara thought. she was always a lot stronger on theory than execution. but we'll get it. julian! what are you doing up this early? you've been working for 16 hours straight. i thought you could do with some sandwiches. that's very thoughtful. you're a gentlemen and a scholar. truer words were never spoken.
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ah! it's about time. you almost missed your transport. where's your baggage? never mind i'll have it sent to you. that won't be necessary, father. i'm not leaving. ziyal... i know we haven't spent much time together but i think you know me well enough to realize that when i give an order, i expect to be obeyed. i'm not one of your soldiers. i'm tora naprem's daughter, too. i am half bajoran. i don't belong on cardassia. you know i will never be accepted there. ziyal, you have to trust me. things are going to change on cardassia. what things? i don't have time to explain. you're leaving now. i can't go. it's him, isn't it?! that despicable tailor. you won't leave because you're waiting for him?
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listen to me, ziyal. he's never coming back. he's probably dead already and even if he isn't the federation is going to seal the wormhole. garak will be trapped on the other side. he made a promise... and so did i. i said i would wait for him and i will. is a promise... to an enemy of your family more important than obeying your father? so be it. stay here if that's what you want.
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i should have let that monster die forgotten and alone. frankly, i'm glad you came. misery loves company. all my life i've done nothing but try to please that man. i let him mold me... let him turn me into a mirror image of himself. and how did he repay me? with exile. but i forgave him. and here, in the end, i thought maybe just maybe, he could forgive me. from what i've seen of him doesn't come across as the forgiving type. i've been a fool. let this be a lesson to you, doctor. perhaps the most valuable one i can ever teach you. sentiment is the greatest weakness of all. if that's true it's a lesson i'd rather not learn. i thought you might want to know-- if you wish to speak to tain... do it now
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elim... elim, is that you? it's me. everything's gone dark. are you alone? yes. there's no one else but you and me. surjak, memad, brun... they can't be trusted. they must be dealt with. i've already taken care of it.
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were you able to contact him? years ago. the romulan ambassador? he's gone. all your enemies are dead. good. a man shouldn't allow his enemies to outlive him. then you can die happy. unless you still consider me your enemy. elim... promise me one thing. i'm listening. escape. live. let me guess... so that i can make the dominion pay for what they've done to you. you wouldn't deny an old man his revenge, would you? i'll do as you ask... on one condition: that you don't ask me this favor as a mentor
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you're not my son. father... father, you're dying. for once in your life speak the truth. i should have killed your mother before you were born. you have always been a weakness i can't afford. so you've told me. many times. abran... all i ask is that for this moment let me be your son. elim... remember that day in the country-- you must have been almost five... how can i forget it?
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on the back of that riding hound. you must've fallen off a dozen times. but you never gave up. i remember limping home. you held my hand. i was very proud of you... that day.
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gentlemen, i don't know about you... but my business here is done.
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a full-scale dominion invasion appears imminent. still, i remain confident in my crew's ability to face this crisis as they have so many others-- with dedication and with courage. our last listening post in the gamma quadrant went dead. that one was on the other side of the wormhole. which means the fleet is close. chief! nearly ready. worf... is a klingon warrior. he'll understand.
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ready. here goes nothing. activate graviton emitters. may the prophets forgive us. we're losing it. what happened? someone sabotaged sisko: battle stations!
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and paramount television
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( playing light jazz version of "heart and soul" ) isn't supposed to be cooked? steamed, fried? the idea is to shower the couple with a symbol of good fortune, not garnish them like a roast chicken. smile. rice, anyone? red alert. ready?
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this is it, tom. your bachelor days are over. not a moment too soon. second thoughts? second, third, fourth... i never thought i'd see the day. given the volatile nature of their relationship, one might have when it comes to affairs of the human heart it is wise to look beyond logic. we're gathered here today not as starfleet officers, but as friends and family to celebrate the marriage of two of voyager's finest. b'elanna has asked me to forego the rigors of klingon painsticks in favor of a more traditional ceremony.
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( guests chuckling ) as captain the honor of joining these two people has fallen to me but before i declare them husband and wife tom and b'elanna have prepared their own vows. i still don't know what i've done to deserve you... but whatever it is, i'll try to keep doing it and i promise to stand by you to honor you... till death do us part. ensign. hmm? ( whispers ): the ring. oh. may this ring be a symbol of our eternal love. you stood by me...
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you were willing to see past my shortcomings... and to take all the bumps and bruises that came along with it. you made me a better person... even though i put up one hell of a fight. i look forward to our journey together. commander. may this ring be the symbol of our eternal love. not so fast. lieutenant thomas eugene paris... lieutenant b'elanna torres with the power vested in me by starfleet command and the united federation of planets
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now, tom. ( applause ) bravo. congratulations. for what? you may not want to know.
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[captioning sponsored by paramount television united paramount network
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captain's log, stardate 52586.3: we've had a lot to celebrate lately-- tom and b'elanna's wedding, ensign harper's new baby and the continued health of our enhanced warp drive which has taken us within striking distance of home. in this case the shortest path is a straight line. we'll pass right through the center of the milky way. and be in sector 001 within two years. more or less.
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ions? two years, 11 days, six hours provided we continue to operate at peak efficiency. naturally. of course, if we operate at peak efficiency we'll be missing some interesting phenomena along the way-- an anomalous gradient to the curvature of space unusual bioharmonic readings from a binary system we'll reach in six months. the scientist in you can't resist stopping to look. it would only add two or three months. do you think the crew would mutiny? on the contrary. everyone'll jump at the chance everyone... except seven. let your first officer deal with the personnel problems. here's a lovely program modeled after a mountain resort on the fifth moon of cytrax-- just you, b'elanna and the crickets. crickets? cytraxian crickets. their song is reputed to be an auditory aphrodisiac. aha. well, between you and me-- b'elanna and i don't need aphrodisiacs.
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there's always the beaches of ahmedeen-- windsurfing on a sea of liquid argon. i was hoping for someplace a little more down-to-earth. well, it's your honeymoon. how down-to-earth did you mean? earth. i was thinking chicago in the roaring '20s-- speakeasies, flappers, the charleston. if that's what you want. why? is there a problem? no, of course not, but we're so close to earth i thought you might want to try something a little more exotic. earth has the best vacation spots in the galaxy. it's got the cultures, the climates the history, the people. it has everything you ever want in a planet. you sound like a travel brochure. ( laughs ) no. no. just a native. oh, and make sure the deuterium manifold's are never opened wider than 600 microns. i am familiar with the specifications. are you familiar with how temperamental the isolitic converter can be? yes.
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with the dilithium matrix running hot all the time you have to watch it like a hawk. there is no point in providing me with knowledge i already possess. i guess i am being a little overcautious. i've just, uh, never been away from engineering for more than a couple of days... certainly never a week. my engineering abilities are more than sufficient. enjoy your honeymoon. you may understand the iso-dynamics of this engine but i don't think you understand its personality. ality. it is a propulsion device. that's my point. it's not just a device. it-it has its own quirks, its own... its own moods. ( alarm blaring ) that's just a minor fluctuation in a subsidiary injector port. i will take care of it. i'm going with you. lieutenant, you are on leave. not for another 20 minutes. so, who's the lucky guy?
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yes, the doctor informed me of that archaic human superstition. how about harry kim? i fail to see the benefit of monogamous relationships. so you want to stay single? if you mean remain open to social situations with a wide variety of individuals then yes. i'm married-- i'm not going into stasis for the rest of my life. no, i plan to have... i do not wish to be dependent on anyone. by marrying, one limits one's romantic interactions to a single individual-- a circumstance which implies extreme monotony. i'm glad we had this little talk. ( sighs ) try the manual release. i thought you said it was a minor fluctuation. this entire jefferies tube is losing molecular cohesion. i guess the honeymoon's off. it's our warp field. the enhanced drive is emitting
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it's beginning to break down the molecular bonds in all surrounding sections. we're seeing early stages of the effect in the warp core. reaction chamber, injector ports-- they're all showing signs of de-cohesion. it doesn't make any sense. we knew about the subspace radiation and ran dozens of simulations before we brought the new drive on-line. have you tried taking the core off-line? it's not stopping the problem. try to isolate the cause of this and stabilize the sections dismissed. computer. begin chief engineer's log, supplemental. i've spent the last four hours
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. ( gasps ) computer, did it just get colder in here? computer: negative. raise the temperature by five degrees. hungry? ah, can't join you tonight-- dinner with b'elanna. married one day and you're already domesticated. ( chuckling ): jealous? good night, harry. b'elanna? if we're going to live together we're going to have to compromise on the temperature. computer, reset environmental controls to standard. b'elanna?
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shh. bring her in, quickly. it looks like we've got
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acute cellular degradation? their chromosomes are breaking down at the molecular level. proximity to the warp field. i believe so. b'elanna and my other three patients all work in engineering. they've been subjected to the heaviest exposure
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including the captain. it's only a matter of time before you begin showing the same symptoms. we've shut down the warp drive but the ship is still deteriorating and so are we. why? every bulkhead and conduit from deck one to 15 show signs of molecular de-cohesion. even food from the replicator ecay. as soon as anything comes into contact with voyager's atmosphere, it's affected. that's what we thought at first but take a look at this. these vegetables are completely free of decay. i thought you said the replicators... they weren't replicated. i harvested them on an away mission last week. the same goes for these particle accelerators the trilithium ore samples, the keg of hazari ale. all of them were brought aboard over the last few months and none of them is disintegrating. we haven't been able to narrow the time frame precisely but it appears that anything
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something happened to the ship months ago that's causing this decay. a logical conclusion. eight months, 17 days ago-- first contact with the kmada. they tried to sabotage our life-support systems with low-frequency theta radiation. any chance that could have caused the phenomenon? unlikely. let's keep looking. the next event of note took place nine months, two days ago when the n'kree tried to conscript voyager into their battle fleet. next? hey.
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how's my old lady? well enough... to break your nose if you call me that again. ( chuckles ) there it is. what? our honeymoon. tell me. six days and seven nights... in the historic graystone hotel in beautiful downtown chicago, circa 1928. uh, wait till you see it-- crystal chandeliers
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rive up michigan avenue in a vintage duesenberg hobnob with the stars of the silver screen dance the charleston at a genuine speakeasy called the green mill. what do i wear? that's already taken care of. our bags are packed and waiting for us at the hotel. ( sighs ) champagne? it's on ice... in a silver bucket... right next to our canopy bed. b'elanna? ( alarm blaring ) doctor? cortical stimulator. initiate an iso-synaptic pulse.
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increase the electrolytic level to 75 millijoules. we've lost her. increasing electrolytic levels to 90 millijoules. there's nothing more we can do. uh, maybe we can try a direct neural resequencing. lieutenant... her die! return to your quarters. no! ( sighs ) i don't want to leave her. i understand but i need to perform an analysis before her cells have completely degraded.
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nine months, 28 days. we collected silicate from a comet in the podaris sector. according to neelix's manifest those samples are stored in the geology lab. they're showing no signs of molecular degradation. take us further back. ten months, 11 days ago. voyager was forced to land on a class-y planetoid in the vaskan sector. one of our more interesting missions. we set down looking for deuterium and ended up helping a new form of life to be born. the planet possessed a bio-mimetic compound. the "silver blood." it sampled our dna and created duplicates of the entire crew. i've often wondered what happened to them. are they flourishing? have they continued to evolve?
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is she...? i'm afraid so. scan for traces of deuterium hydrogen sulfate and dichromates. dichromates? just do it. what's this about? we have a disturbing theory. i'm detecting all of those compounds. i want you to inject her with a dichromate catalyst. commander? i don't understand. that wasn't b'elanna. it was a duplicate... a bio-mimetic copy.
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behold the primordial soup. that's what created us. not just us. the entire ship is composed of the same material. it's a bio-mimetic compound that duplicated the crew's molecular structure so precisely that i would never have detected it if i hadn't known what to look for. i was born on earth... in indiana. i remember growing up there. i remember graduating from the academy. i have no memory of being a copy.
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were duplicated as well. somehow, after the real voyager left we began to forget we were duplicates. eventually, we assumed their lives and set a course for earth. and now the warp core is breaking down our cellular structure. we didn't think the radiation would hurt us because it isn't harmful to humanoids. doctor: each and every one of you will disintegrate just as b'elanna did. i'm not immune, either. the holo-emitters, like everything else, are copies. what can we do to stop the process? chakotay: there is one option. go back. to the demon-class planet? we were created to survive there. he's correct. it's reasonable to assume that if we return to our native environment the degradation will cease. even if we survived the trip we'd be traveling thousands of light-years in the wrong direction.
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duplicate or not i'm still the same person i was yesterday and so are all of you... and that means we're going to do everything possible to complete our mission, which is to reach earth. is that clear? janeway: i want you yes, ma'am. to adjust the environmental controls to simulate a class-y planet. that should slow the rate of degradation. it's only a matter of time before the environmental controls themselves are affected. i realize that. that's why we're going to try and find a safe harbor till we can figure out a way to stop the degradation. class-y planet and set a course. in the meantime... i'll explain our situation to the crew. there's still a great deal we don't know about this phenomenon and i have every confidence we'll find a way to reverse it. so you're saying all our experiences before we were duplicated-- none of it's real?
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if everything about us was duplicated that includes our memory engrams the emotional centers of our brain. so, if you feel something... remember something... believe something... i'm not about to tell you it's not real. but there is another crew out there, right? the real voyager. i suppose there is, but i don't want that thought what mission is that? the same as it's always been, tom-- to reach the alpha quadrant safe and sound but to do that we're going to have to beat this problem... and for now, that means conserving energy running the ship in grey mode, cutting crew shifts in half.
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duplicates or not... you're still my crew. dismissed. tom... there's no one here by that name. i just wanted to say... i'm sorry about b'elanna. sorry? what for? she was your wife. she was a duplicate... st like you are, harry. you heard the captain. if we're going to survive this we've got to believe in ourselves. ( scoffs ) ( chuckling ) you can drop the good soldier routine. you don't have to do everything the captain says anymore. hell, she's not even the captain. she is to me. okay. well, let's suppose she does get us back to earth. what then? you really think your family
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. for all you know, the real harry kim is having sunday dinner with them right now. and you come strolling through the door they're going to see you for exactly what you are-- an impostor. so what are we going to do, huh? wait around till we all disintegrate? ( door beeping ) chicken paprikas-- my grandmother's recipe. well, maybe not my grandmother but it's still delicious. it's our weekly dinner together. don't tell me you forgot. we've lost three more people. we've got to head back. i've spent the past five years trying to get this crew home. i'm not about to quit now. listen to yourself.
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home is a class-y planet in the delta quadrant. we don't belong on earth. how do you know where we belong? for all we know the real voyager's been destroyed and we're all that's left. for all we know we're supposed to be living their lives. that's a pretty big assumption... and it's putting this crew in danger. there's only one thing i know how to be, chakotay and that's kathryn janeway. i'd like to think and as much as she'd like to get her crew home i don't think she'd be willing to kill them in the process. maybe this dinner wasn't such a good idea after all. i've tried everything i can think of--
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with replicated dna-- and i'm no closer to finding a cure. but i do have an idea. i'm listening. find the original voyager. if the real captain janeway were here we could sample her dna and imprint it onto your mimetic pattern. but, doctor, we have no way of knowing where they are. they could be behind us, ahead of us back on earth... destroyed. besides, even if we could find the real janeway how do we know she'd help? she's you. my emitter's starting to degrade. tuvok to the captain. sensors have detected a class-y planet. on my way. kim: it may not be home, it checks out. thermionic radiation... surface temperatures in excess of 500 kelvins. just what the doctor ordered. safe harbor? there's no guarantee this is going to work. harry, vent all plasma from the nacelles.
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g sequence. yes, ma'am. red alert. landing struts on-line. inertial dampers at maximum. take us down, mr. paris. captain, a vessel is approaching from the planet surface. on screen. kim: they're hailing. open a channel. alien voice: you're in direct violation of the ord'mirit mining treaty. leave orbit or you'll be destroyed. they are firing weapons.
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