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tv   FOX 45 News at 10  FOX  November 3, 2013 10:00pm-10:30pm EST

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let's see what you got. hit it. ("bootylicious" begins) ♪ jayelle, can you handle this? ♪ ♪ shadonda ♪ can you handle this? ♪ aphasia, can you handle this? ♪ ♪ i don't think they can handle this ♪ ♪ better move 'cause we've arrived ♪ ♪ lookin' sexy, lookin' fly ♪ ♪ baddest chicks, chicks inside ♪ ♪ deejay, jam tonight ♪ spotted me, a tender thang ♪ there you are, come on, baby ♪ ♪ don't you wanna dance with me? ♪ ♪ can you handle, handle me? ♪ ♪ lookin' hot, smellin' good ♪ groovin' like i'm from the hood ♪ ♪ over my shoulder i'll blow you a kiss ♪ ♪ can you handle, handle this? ♪ ♪ i don't think you're ready for this jelly ♪ ♪ i don't think you're ready for this jelly ♪ ♪ i don't think you're ready for this ♪ ♪ 'cause my body's too bootylicious for ya, babe ♪ ♪ i don't think you're ready for this jelly ♪ ♪ i don't think you're ready for this jelly ♪ ♪ i don't think you're ready for this ♪
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♪ 'cause my body's too bootylicious for ya, babe ♪ ♪ move your body up and down ♪ ooh ♪ ♪ make your booty touch the ground ♪ ♪ ooh ♪ ♪ i can't help but wonder why ♪ is my vibe too vibe-alicious for ya, babe? ♪ ♪ i shake my jelly at every chance ♪ ♪ when i whip with my hips you slip into a trance ♪ ♪ i'm hoping you can handle all this jelly that i have ♪ ♪ now let's cut a rug while we scat some jazz ♪ catting) ♪ i don't think you're ready for this jelly ♪ ♪ don't think you're ready for this jelly ♪ ♪ i don't think you're ready for this, 'cause my body's ♪ ♪ too bootylicious for you, babe ♪ ♪ i don't think you're ready for this jelly ♪ ♪ i don't think you're ready for this jelly ♪ ♪ i don't think you're ready for this 'cause my ♪ ♪ body's too bootylicious for you, babe ♪ ♪ i don't think you're ready ♪ for this jelly, i don't think you're ready ♪ ♪ for this jelly i don't think you're ready ♪ ♪ for this 'cause my body's too bootylicious for you, babe. ♪
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yeah. (indistinct overlapping chatter) mr. shue, you seem concerned. what? no. i mean, they were great, but we're just as good. mr. shue, if i may. what they were doing was just all smoke and mirrors. it's called "hairography." what? hairography. all the whizzing of their hair around just to distract from not really good dancers. and their vocals were just so-so. trust me. we've nothing to be afraid of. (school bell ringing) all right, guys. i did some thinking last night. i think i found our new numb for sectionals. we're going to do the title song from hair.
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now, this show started a revolution. wait, did they have mohawks back then? like in the 20's or whatever? yeah, mr. shue, if we're going to do a song about hair, shouldn't we have more hair? one step ahead of you. here are your wigs. mr. schuester? yeah? what are you doing? we are fine where we awe are. we don't need hairography. it's just a distraction. look, i have to be honest. those jane addams girls did freak me out a little. and i'm worried about our chances for sectionals. i mean, we have to pull out all the stops if we want to win. (laughing) looking great, guys! (will laughs) puck: saw it in a bookstore. figured i'd steal it for you. you know, in case you change your mind and decide you want to keep it. that is so sweet. to be honest, i really don't know what i'm going to do about it anymore. my mind's pretty messed up about everything. well, whatever you decide. no pressure. quinn: thank god for puck. thanks to him, i'm starting to realize
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that what i need right now, even more than looser pants, is acceptance. everyone is puttg so much pressure on me. it's so easy for them to be distracted. i don't have that luxury. i am under siege. you don't drink diet soda, do you? because the phosphoric acid causes male pattern baldness. the baby's a girl. women go bald, too. you worry too much, terri. mom smoked and drank a bottle of riuniti on ice every night when she was pregnant with us and we're totally normal. just take your vitamins, stay out of the hot tub, and avoid rum-based drinks, and you'll be fine. maybe the problem isn't that i don't want to keep the baby. the problem is that i don't want to keep the baby with finn. maybe i didn't give puck enough of a chance. he is the real dad, after all. finn would freak if i started spending time with puck though. i need to distract him so that i can take puck for a test drive. but how? mmm, forget about it. she looks like a five year old.
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still, maybe with a little bit of makeup... hey, kurt, can i pick your pink brain for a second? why hello, quinn. to what do i owe the honor? i do believe this is the first time you've ever spoken to me. i'm sorry about that. anyways, i have a proposition to make: a makeover. i'm in! makeovers are like crack to me. uh-huh. my suggestion... spanx. or a double-knit camisole with a control top for the baby bump. also, babydoll dresses-- dead giveaway. not for me, for rachel. why would i want to do that? i admit i like a challenge as much as the next guy, but rachel somehow manages to dress like a grandmother and a toddler at the same time. my point exactly. you're as concsucceeding as i am, and she's a distraction. look at her. she's wearing a pantsuit. don't you think the judges are going to take one look at her and maybe want to knock her down a peg or two? and to think... i thought you were a dumb blonde.
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good night. good night. (gasping) what are you doing?!i'm trying e with my wife. no, you're trying to have sex. wh... not intimacy. if you wanted intimacy, you... you would ask me how i'm feeling about being pregnant. you're right. i'm sorry. it's okay. it will all be worth it when she shows up, right? yeah. of course. love you. love you.
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terri: there's no way i can keep this up. he's gonna catch on. i miss him, too, though. i do want to have a family with him. i only ever started lying about all of this to give us a chance. i just need to buy myself some more time. i've got to distract him with something. but what? ow. the key is to never wax above the eyebrow. always shape from below. trust me, i get a lot of practice. look at mine. kurt, why did you volunteer to give me a new look? one, i'm a sucker for makeovers, and two, you need something to distract from your horrible personality. most of the time, i find it hard to be in the same room with you. especially this one. which looks like where
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strawberry shortcake and holly hobbie come to hook up. you're extremely talented, rachel. watching you perform is... amazing. but sometimes it's hard to appreciate what a good singer you are because all i'm thinking about is shoving a sock into your mouth. well, what kind of makeover did you have in mind? we need to broaden your appeal. i want every boy at school to do a double take when you strut past. there's really only just... one boy that i'd like to impress. can you keep a secret? of course. i'm in love with finn. really? i understand completely. let's move on to makeup. i happen to know for a fact that finn is attracted to loose women. what? quinn is so wholesome. let me put this into musical theater parlance. in grease, what did sandy do to get danny zuko? she had to ditch the poodle skirt and slap on a cat suit. in short, she had to dress like a ho.
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maybe if your look was better, more desirable, finn would be in your arms right now. instead of quinn's. what's going on, terr? just a couple more steps, okay? all right, stop. will: is that the blue bomber? it is! i remember i took you to prom in this car. we did it in the backseat. well, this isn't actually your old car. i found this one on ebay. you know, i always regretted selling this car. i know. that's why i got you this one. i thought maybe working on it would be a-- a distraction from all the pressure that you've been under. you are the best. honey. yeah? um, could you go and get me a frozen yogurt? yeah, sure. oh, maybe i'll stop by pep boys. maybe they have some advice. that's a good idea.
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yeah. take your time, honey. how could you bring her here? what if he saw her? you're gonna want to hear this. i gave little miss peroxide my phone number in case of an emergency, and she called to drop the bomb on me. what? what bomb? what is it? i'm keeping my baby. (bell ringing) look, we had no intention of discriminating against your glee club, mr. rumba. we extended an invitation to the jane addams academy to perform, because we're lucky enough to have better facilities than they do. and you think we don't have the same problem? i run the glee club at a school for the deaf. (phone ringing) you think i'm rolling around in deaf choir money? now sure, my kids may be deaf, but that shouldn't distract everyone from the fact that they still have a song in their heart, and they should ha the same chance as everyone else to express it. now i had scarlet fever as a kid, (ringing continues) leaving me deaf in one ear. so i remember what it's like to have full hearing, but my poor kids don't know the difference. (ringing continues) all they know is that they love performing.
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and then they have to hear that mckinley went and invited those bad girls to the school. (ringing continues) that's just not fair. it's not fair. i think your phone's ringing. what? your phone's ringing. no, i got it on vibrate. all i am saying is that it would be nice if you went and hosted another scrimmage and had the courtesy to invite us this time. i couldn't agree more. what's that? i said i agree with you. okay, i can't hear you. talk into this ear. scarlet fever. i'm sorry... (loudly): you're on! um, how's monday? no, it has to be monday. yes! all right! monday! i can't wait to see the kids do their numbers! you don't have to make f of me with those hand gestures. no, i didn't... (loudly): i didn't mean to. let me check with my secretary. oh, damn, four missed calls. what's that? i didn't say anything. yes, thank you. i take it black, two sugars. hello. hello?!
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i want you to know stuff i want you to be kind. i want you to be smart. super smart. i want one thing in a doctor. i nt you to be handsome. i want you to be awesome. i don't want you to look at thchart before you say hi...david. i want you to return my emails. i want you to ep me doing this for another sixty years. at kaiser permanente, want u to choose the doctor that's right for you. find your perfect match at and thrive.
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[ man ] adventure, it means taking chances. it means trying something new. [ woman ] just, that uncertainty of what's to come. [ man ] just kidding. ♪ can you please stop doing that? ♪ [ woman ] you walk outside in brooklyn, and it's cement and broken glass. and this is just like... the opposite of that. ♪ do this anymore.te of that.
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it's time to tell him. will: terri? yeah, honey? oh, hey, kendra. damn, will. you make one sexy grease monkey. i am having so much fun. working with my hands, searching for parts all over town. i feel like i'm in a springsteen song. well, i got to get some old dish towels-- mop up the grime. that car is the perfect distraction. i would get something like that for phil if i didn't think it would make him so happy. what's the difference? he's going to get pretty damn suspicious when i come home from the hospital without a baby. you need to relax. and drink more. i have got this whole thing figured out. you do? mm-hmm. blondie's due date is right around spring break. you and i are going to have a lady's week at a spa down in cincci that caters to the prenatal set. but, in reality, we're gonna be camped out at wu's office with quinn until that high-school hussy drops. that's a great plan.
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except for the fact that quinn won't give us her baby anymore. but she will, dummy. we have to distract her with the reality of her situation. how are we going to do that? she needs money. i'm going to have her babysit my kids. five minutes alone with those little mongrels and she'll have her tubes tied. you're so smart. you got the beauty, but i got the brains and the beauty. (laughing) (bell ringing) hey, rachel. oh, hey, finn. i didn't see you there. did you want to ask me something? uh, yeah, i-i just, i forgot. i got distracted. well, i'm glad i got your attention. i wanted to know if you wanted to come over on friday night. as someone who's had long, luxurious locks since i was a toddler in the pageant circuit, i figured i could give you some tips on our hair number. yeah, that'd be great.
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great. how's 8:00? 8:00 is terrific. it's terrific. objective achieved. commence phase two. hey, quinn. i, uh, wanted to ask your permission to maybe do something on friday night, if... oh, that's fine. i'm babysitting anyways. oh, cool. i'll see y hey, what are you doing on friday? just the usual. was going to stand outside the 7-eleven looking depressed until someone offered to buy me beer, but what's going on? you want to maybe babysit with me? (bell ringing) some of you, particularly the guys, have come up to me with some questions about hairography. one of our own has volunteered to walk us through it. she has got it down. brittany, take it away. take what away? show us what you got. oh. all right.
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so, hairography. it works best when you pretend like you're getting tasered. so you just move your head around like you're spazzing and stuff. very nice. wow. you guys, it's like cool epilepsy. will: come on, guys. let's see what you got. good, guys, yeah. just relax and go for it, all right. my neck, my back. (laughter) when is the lying going to stop, sue? i don't know what you're talking about. you've been spying on me and we both know it. you'll do anything to torpedo glee club. and it has got to stop! sue: i resent that accusation, william. and one i understand you've been making to our friends at haverbrook and jane addams. and it's an outrageous affront to my sterling reputation! that being said, fine, i have been checking up on you. because i don't like what's going on in there. do you know why i make each of my cheerios
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wear her hair pulled back in a ponytail? because i don't want to distract from her impeccable talent. you seem to be taking the opposite approach, will. and that leads me to believe you know your kids don't have what it takes. i believe in my kids. well, maybe in the beginning, but not now. now that you've seen the competition that threatens your very position at this school! you're going to get me an updated set list by 5:00 tomorrow. and if there's anything on that list that involves demeaning, fruity hair tossing, i'm cutting it! i will not let you dictate my number choices. and you are not getting that list. well, then i'm back as co-director. (sighs)
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eturn after these messages.
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this is the creamy chicken corn chowder. i mean, look at it. so indulgent. did i tell you i am on the... [ both ] chicken pot pie diet! me too! [ male announcer ] so indulgent, you'll never believe they're light. 100-calorie progresso light soups. [ female announcer ] at 100 calories, not all food choices add up. some are giant. some not so giant. when managing your weight, bigger is always better. ♪ ho ho ho ♪ green giant
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i'll just be a second. ♪ ho ho ho thanks again for helping me out with this hairography stuff. yeah, i mean, you know, it's all about getting warmed up. could you think of a song, maybe, that we could practice with? what about the, the one om ease? you know, we did it when you first joined the club? okay, only i was just mostly nervous that day, but it... (sultry): tell me about it... stud. (piano playing upbeat pop) ♪ i got chills, they're multiplyin' ♪ ♪ and i'm losing control ♪ 'cause the power you're supplyin' ♪
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♪ it's electrifyin'! ♪ you better shape up ♪ 'cause i need a man ♪ but my heart is set on you wait, stop, stop. what's wrong? i need to be honest with you. i'm-i'm really uncomfortable right now. i'm gonna say this as nicely as i possibly can, but you look like a sad clown hooker. what? this look, it just isn't you. i mean, maybe when i first saw it, i was caught off guard that you looked all adult and stuff, but it's not what's really great about you, rachel. i actually like the way you usually dress, sequined leg warmers and stuff. i thought this was what you liked. no, not at all. funny, i was just having this conversation last week with kurt, and he asked me... so what kind of girls do you like?
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oh, uh, i like it when they're natural and stuff; not a lot of makeup, not skintight clothes. that sort of thing, you know? totally. i feel like an idiot. no, no, this is my fault. it isn't right for me to be here anyway. but i really like you, rachel. i gotta go. (kids yelling) i told you we should have been the cowboys. my bad. what are we gonna do about this? who are you texting?! uh, mike ching. he's got wig problems. well, put the phone down and help me with this knot. i've almost got it. (yelling continues) (grunts) stop that! not the table! think of something! i brought my guitar. why don't we sing them a lullaby? give me this. hey, kids, look at me.
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want to see a real live music video? - yeah. - okay. ♪ papa, i know you're going to be upset ♪ ♪ 'cause i was always your little girl ♪ ♪ but you should know by now, i'm not a baby ♪ ♪ you always taught me right from wrong ♪ ♪ i need your help, daddy, please be strong ♪ ♪ i may be young at heart, but i know what i'm sayin' ♪ ♪ the one you warned me all about ♪ ♪ the one you said i could do without ♪ ♪ we're in an awful mess ♪ and i don't mean maybe, please ♪ ♪ papa don't preach, i'm in trouble deep ♪ ♪ papa don't preach, i been losing sleep ♪ ♪ but i made up my mind, i'm keepin' my baby ♪
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♪ ooh, i'm gonna keep my baby, mm-mmm. ♪ (song ends) sing it again. i think this is the first time they have all been asleep at the same time. - what's that smell? - soap. you got them to take a bath? what are you, an exorcist? she's like a jet, right? i need a new clutch and a new set of shocks, but she is really coming together. what are you gonna do when the kid comes? you can't put a car seat in that thing. no latch system. puck: you were awesome tonight. i was surprised at how i kinda enjoyed it.


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