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tv   Jimmy Kimmel Live  ABC  September 21, 2021 11:35pm-12:37am PDT

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dan: we appreciate your time. lee bob >> dicky: from hollywood, it's linebacker live! tonight, billy bob thornton. fred savage. from "the wonder years," elijah "e.j." williams. and music from st. vincent. and now, jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: hi there. thank you, thank you. very nice. thanks. i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thank you for coming. [ cheers and applause ] oh, boy. we have so many things to get to, but i want to start tonight with a story that will lift our spirits. our spirits are starting to get a little droopy, so let's give them a lift.
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what we do is go to a surgeon and give them a lift. [ laughter ] there's a new guinness world record from japan -- a pair of sisters, who, at the age of 107, have been crowned the world's oldest living identical twins. there they are -- umeno and komay. aka mary-kate and ashley oldsen. [ laughter ] that's komay, the face of a woman who's pissed she's missing "wheel of fortune" to take this picture. the previous record-holders were also from japan. one of them died in 2000. the other in 2001. at age 108. you know what they died of? it's weird. they both died in skateboarding accidents. [ laughter ] yeah. half-pipe. finally got 'em. you know? but congratulations to umeno and komay. and while we're congratulating our elders on keeping it together, the oldest president in u.s. history was in new york today, addressing the united nations. joe biden is older than the u.n. itself. [ laughter ] that's not a joke, that's true. he's like "i remember when this
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building was a salt water taffy shack!" [ laughter ] all his leader friends from other countries were there -- the fella from down under, big guy, too tall, padre, bucko, slick, they were all present and accounted for. this was biden's first speech to the general assembly since taking office. he told the assembly that u.s. military power should not be the answer to every problem. for that, we have alcohol and weed. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] biden covered a lot of ground in his remarks -- covid, afghanistan, climate change -- he pushed for unity and weighed in on one of the greatest threats facing our world today. >> corn pap was a bad dude and he ran a bunch of bad boys. confronted by three guys and straight razors. those days, remember the
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straight razors, bang them on the curb, put them in the rain barrel, get them rusty? there was a guy named bill wright, used to come down here in the basement where mechanics -- where all the pool is. he cut off six foot of chain, he followed up, you walk out with that chain and you walk to the car and you say, you may cut me, man, but i'm going to wrap this chain around your head. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that's right. all right, now who wants to negotiate a trade deal? [ laughter ] in order to be allowed on the general assembly floor, all leaders had to either be vaccinated or test negative for covid, but they didn't have to show proof. they did it on the honor system. and if you can't trust china and russia, who can you trust? [ laughter ] brazilian president jair bolsonaro is famously anti-vaccine. here he is arriving in new york. [ laughter ] [ applause ] president bolsonaro believes the
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vaccine turns people into crocodiles. and bearded ladies too. this astrazeneca has a lot of range, i have to say. some call him the brazilian trump. which brazilian trump, euphemism for when they wax off your orange hair "downstairs." [ laughter and applause ] it was a tough day for fox news. they didn't get hold of anything good to make fun of biden for. this is from yesterday. this is on the so brazen it's hard to believe these words were spoken list. trump's former economic advisor, a party clown named larry kudlow, i'm not sure if this would be considered to be gaslighting, or if there's just a gas leak at his house. >> with an extremely divisive biden, i will tell you, folks, i kind of yearn for the calm, peaceful, orderly, prosperous, america-first, around the globe days of donald trump. just saying.
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>> jimmy: right, right. who can forget those peaceful, prosperous, orderly, and calm days? genghis calm we used to call him. [ applause ] i think memory is the first to go. that's how calm it was. i guess the memory is first to go. we are learning details about the calm, peaceful, orderly, prosperous days of donald trump thanks to a new book by bob woodward and robert costa of "the washington post" that came out today. the book is called "peril." it lays out what went down at the white house in the aftermath of the insurrection on january 6th. there are some bombshell allegations, including a memo outlined by one of trump's lawyers, john eastman. that's john eastman on the left. with the hat on. it takes a lot to make rudy giuliani look like the sane lawyer. [ laughter ] john was able to do that. the book says eastman drew up a six-step plan explaining how mike pence should overturn the results of the election. and the steps went like this.
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step one, vice president pence, presiding over the joint session, opens and begins starting the ballots, starting with alabama. step two -- when he gets to arizona, pence pretends to have a coughing fit and reaches for a glas of water. step three -- while reaching for the glass, pence knocks the ballots onto the floor, saying the words "whoopsie daisy" loudly, so everyone can hear. step four -- as pence is picking up the ballots, he shouts, "hey, what's that over there?!" then kicks ballots from seven key battleground states under the podium. step five -- pence asks everyone to check under their chairs for the ballots, and while they're distracted looking under their chairs, he swallows, he eats all the ballots. [ laughter ] georgia, pennsylvania, wisconsin, all in his stomach now. at this point, no one can find the ballots, so pence explains that he has no choice but to declare trump the winner. step six -- pence bangs his gavel, hops aboard space force one, and is never seen again. [ laughter ] [ applause ]
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for some reason, he refused to go along with this plan. the real memo suggested that pence use the element of surprise. they wanted him to just show up and without warning, overturn the results of the election. at which, i don't know, without asking permission, that seems impossible for mike pence. i mean, look at him. mike pence is a guy who asks if it's okay for him to go to the bathroom when he's alone. [ laughter ] he doesn't do things like that. this guy eastman came up with a hell of an opinion. "the fact is that the constitution assigns this power to the vice president as the ultimate arbiter." right. he's basically arguing that the third base umpire can declare himself the winner of the world series. [ laughter ] meanwhile, does anyone know what melania's up to? i feel like any day now we're going to find out she's engaged to a jonas brother. [ laughter ] the former ceo of amazon and future resident of mars jeff bezos made a big announcement yesterday. bezos is donating a billion dollars to protect 30% of
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earth's land and sea. which sounds like a lot until you realize he's worth $200 billion. why not spend another $3 billion, protect 100% of the earth's land and sea? [ applause ] you'd still have like $196 billion. of course, what he doesn't mention is he's protecting the earth from himself. [ laughter ] is it possible to destroy the planet and save it at the same time? jeff bezos is the only guy who's so rich that when you hear he donated a billion dollars to charity, you're like, "what a cheap bastard." [ laughter and applause ] this wasn't cheap either. here in l.a., the clippers broke ground on their new 1.8 billion dollar stadium in inglewood. they had a party. a band, at this times and the tantrums, were there to celebrate. kawhi leonard in particular really seemed to be digging the music. ♪ ♪
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>> jimmy: yeah. kawhi, as in -- "ka-why am i here?" [ laughter ] clippers fever. catch it! speaking of fever, in vaccine news, johnson & johnson says now getting a second shot -- remember, it was a one-shot deal with johnson & johnson. but if you get the second shot, they say it increases the effectiveness of their vaccine to 94%. that's good news for johnson & johnson. until this point, johnson & johnson was basically the mr. pibb of vaccines. [ laughter ] you're like, all right, i guess. a year ago, we didn't have vaccines. or a plan to get them out there once we did. and so to remind us of how far we've come, every week we look back at what was in the news exactly one year ago. and it's time now for another edition of "this week in covid history." >> this week in covid history, it's late september 2020. school is back. and how's the president doing? >> to fight the china virus, we did an a-plus job.
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a-plus. we take an a-plus. we take an a-plus. >> the magna cum loudmouth. hundreds gather to remember justice ruth bader ginsburg. where potus maximus is greeted by an adoring crowd. [ crowd chanting "vote him out" ] >> a simple wish, one that surely would be honored. for here lies a woman whose legacy cannot -- >> let's take a t-shirt, fill the seat. we're going to fill the seat. a woman would be in first place, yes. >> what a bod. but wait. in 2016, mitch mcconnell blocked obama's nominee because it was an election year. what say you this election year, senator? >> mr. president, the majority leader. >> mwahhhhhhh!
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>> oh, he's a charmer. president trump had news. literally. >> we're not going to lose this, except if they cheat. that's the way i look at it. >> will you commit to making sure there's a peaceful transfer of power after the election? >> we're going to have to see what happens. >> oh, a cliffhanger. will the president of the united states let democracy run its course? we'll find out on the next depressing episode of "this week in covid history." [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: we've got a good show for you tonight. fred savage is here. we have music from st. vincent. and we'll be right back with billy bob thornton. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ ♪ you don't become a runner, who breaks eight world records... after age 65, without a serious support system. kathy martin has one in medicare from blue cross blue shield.
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>> jimmy: hi, there. welcome back. tonight, he is the executive producer of "the wonder years" on abc. the original kevin arnold himself, fred savage is here. [ cheers and applause ] then later, you can see her on tour with a stop at the hollywood bowl on friday. her album is called "daddy's home." st. vincent from the mercedes-benz stage. [ cheers and applause ] tomorrow night, we have a big show planned. what's happening tomorrow is we are teaming up with our friends and colleagues for what we're calling "climate night," a special multi-network effort with my fellow late night hosts stephen colbert, jimmy fallon, seth meyers, james corden, samantha bee, andy cohen, trevor noah. we're uniting to focus on the most important issue of all, which is climate change. [ cheers and applause ] so please join us tomorrow night. for an orgy of doomsday comedy. [ laughter ] you may die if you don't.
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if you don't watch at least one of these shows. you will die if you don't watch television tomorrow night. don't say i didn't warn you. our first guest tonight does it all and does it very well. he was, at one time, the fattest baby born in clark county, arkansas. and now he returns as the hard-drinking lawyer billy mcbride on "goliath." the final season premieres friday on amazon prime video, please welcome billy bob thornton. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: you know i can't get enough of that fattest baby in arkansas. >> oh, yeah, i know. yeah, that was -- that was something else, wasn't it? >> jimmy: yeah, it's not often you meet people who were the fattest baby in a county. >> i weighed 30 pounds at 7 1/2 months old. >> jimmy: 30 pounds? >> that's like a sixth grader, you know?
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>> jimmy: it's a good size. it's a real good size. i heard you're moving right now? >> yeah, we moved in may. >> jimmy: you moved, oh. >> to pacoima. >> jimmy: you're living e ingin pacoima? is that the new hot spot? >> that's the one. they're going to do with silver lake. >> jimmy: i bet you they probably well, maybe you've started here tonight. >> we bought this house because it has a separate building that's a recording studio. >> jimmy: ah. >> me and the boss masters will be recording in this place. [ cheers and applause ] thank you, thank you. >> jimmy: that's like -- that's a feature when you saw it? like oh, yeah, i want to have that? >> yeah, i mean -- connie, my wife, she really wanted us to have that. because it keeps me at home. and also, i don't have to drive all the way to the sunset marquee when she kicks me out. [ laughter ] i can just, you know, go down the hill to the recording study i don't. >> jimmy: is that what happens when you have a dispute, you go to the sunset marquee?
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>> yes. >> jimmy: i saw you at the sunset marquee once. >> once? >> jimmy: i've not been there a lot of times. >> he's being nice. >> jimmy: that's the spot, that's like your couch? >> yeah. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you're not kidding, right? >> i'm not kidding. i used to make a joke that every time -- it's not really a joke. every time i would get a divorce, i would live at the sunset marquee. which was pretty often. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: how many times did you live there? >> three or four. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that's a lot of times. >> yeah. >> jimmy: does the guy now at the front desk, when he sees you coming, he knows something is -- what was it about this time? that kind of thing? >> kind of like that, yeah. [ laughter ] dwight yoakam wanted to make a video where you would just start on a car door opening, you see these boots and jeans get out. you follow the boots all the way to this front desk. and you'd hear a voice say,
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"welcome back, mr. thornton." [ laughter ] then do a video from that. >> jimmy: when you moved to l.a., what was going on? were you a carouser? were you like -- were you out having a really good time? >> you know -- i was poverty stricken. but somehow managed to have a good time in the '80s. yeah, i got here in '81, i guess it was. we had -- my buddies and i had a bermuda triangle of sin, which was we would go to a place called the club lingerie on sunset. which is no longer there. we would go to that place and see whatever band was there, which was usually dred zeppelin. and saw dr. john there. then we would go next door to the hollywood athletic club, shoot pool. we would end up at the cat and fiddle across the street. i mean, they were all just like that. >> jimmy: that was your regular rotation? >> that was our regular rotation. >> jimmy: people knew you there? >> unfortunately, yes.
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[ laughter ] >> jimmy: they did. do you keep in touch with those guys? >> oh, yeah, sure. yeah. >> jimmy: do you ever do the rotation? i know club lingerie is not there. but maybe there's a blockbuster or something? [ laughter ] the worst possible reference i could come up with. >> i remember that. >> jimmy: so you guys were hanging out, meeting people. >> yeah. >> jimmy: getting married, getting divorced, doing the whole thing over and over again. >> yeah. >> jimmy: and who made it first? i assume your buddies, were they in show business as well? were they actors? >> most of the guys i hung out with were in acting class or the theater group i belonged to, which was called the west coast ensemble. and we all hung out together. and yeah, i know -- still keep in touch with most of those guys. yeah, i was the first one that broke out, i guess you would say, yeah. >> jimmy: what was the first thing? show or movie that you were in in? >> gosh. i don't know. i did -- i was very excited because i had one scene where i
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played a pawnshop owner on "matlock." >> jimmy: wow. >> i was so excited. because when i was a kid, i used to listen to andy griffith's comedy records where he would do spoofs of cinderella and romeo and juliet and all that stuff. that was the first time i thought, hey, that would be fun to do that, you know? >> jimmy: oh, andy griffith -- that was a big influence then, i guess? >> oh, yeah. yeah, he was. and i watched "the andy griffith show" all the time. so here i'm going to be on "matlock." i went to the set before my scene. he was there. and bob sweeney was directing the episode, who used to direct "the andy griffith show." so i thought i was in tall cotton, as they say, sort of. >> jimmy: yeah. >> and so i went up to him. and i said to him, mr. griffith, i'm playing the pawnshop owner today, i just want to tell you you're the reason i started acting. and he kind of looked at me funny and walked away, i guess he was having a bad day.
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[ laughter ] then you cut to years later. and he called me when i was nominated the first time for an academy award. and he was very nice to me. >> jimmy: wow. >> and so -- then, in '98 i think it was, i directed this movie that nobody ever saw. and he played my father in it. i cast him as my father. and on the set -- by that time we were pals. and i said, do you know, i did an episode of "matlock" one time. and he said, oh, did you? and i said, yeah. he said, which episode was it? and i told him the episode. and he said, oh, i hated that episode. [ laughter ] yeah. so anyway. yeah. >> jimmy: well, never meet your idols, i guess. >> he was very sweet. he was very good to me. >> jimmy: yeah. did you spend a lot of time with him? >> oh, yeah.
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no, i knew him very well, and don knots, i knew them both very well. >> jimmy: don knotts as well, oh. >> that's the thing about it. when you've been in this business a long time, you eventually meet everybody, you meet people you never dreamed you would, it's pretty great. >> jimmy: what was don knotts >> sweet guy, you know? yeah. >> jimmy: funny in real life? >> you know -- no. he was kind of serious. >> jimmy: uh-huh? >> yeah he was more -- andy would be more funny than don. and don was the funny one on the show. >> jimmy: right, yeah, yeah. andy was the straight guy. >> don was really nice. he had some sort of eye disorder, don. >> jimmy: oh. >> one night his girlfriend brought him to meet me at a restaurant over in bearington in brentwood there. i'd been told that don can't really see anymore. and so -- i don't know why you compensate for one thing with another. but we were sitting in this dark booth in this italian
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restaurant. i would sit really, really close to him, like that close to his nose, and shout at him. [ laughter ] he's not deaf, he's blind, but still. it's like -- so don, remember that episode -- whatever. [ laughter ] one way or the other, she had asked me to -- if i could drive him home afterwards. >> jimmy: oh, wow. >> so i'm driving don knots home. this is barney fife in my car. >> jimmy: sure. >> driving him home, we cross santa monica boulevard. he lived in this big condo building there. and so i think he can't see anything. and i said, don, just let me know what the address is, he goes, yeah, you see that third building down on the left? [ laughter ] so he could see way better than i thought. so i realized all night long, he thinks i'm a lunatic because i'm right in his face. [ laughter ] [ applause ] >> jimmy: he tricked you into being his uber driver too.
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>> i know. >> jimmy: billy bob thornton is here. "goliath" premieres friday on amazon prime video. we'll be right back. ♪ ♪ we'll bring the pieces that inspire. you bring a desire to play and discover. together, we'll create a style that is trademark 'you'. welcome the rainbow. taste the rainbow.
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but i'm in the mood to stick my fist up your ass and pull out billions, you get it? [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: just like "matlock." billy bob thornton. that is "goliath," the fourth and final season. you've got good people on the show with you this season. >> oh, yeah. >> jimmy: not that you didn't in previous seasons. >> right. >> jimmy: bruce dern, j.k. simmons. do you and j.k. spend time together, hanging out? >> yeah, a little bit, as much as we could. when we started filming, we got shut down after a couple of weeks. >> jimmy: right, yeah, it's been a long time, hasn't it? >> yeah. >> jimmy: between two seasons. >> it was crazy, yeah. we started back in late august. and, you know, it's funny. because we don't have that many scenes together, because when you have the bad guy and the good guy, he's in his camp motor time, i'm in mine. >> jimmy: right, right. >> when we did do scenes, they were operate electric. i love j.k. he had done a scene in a movie
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called "astronaut farmer." j.k. was in just one scene in that. that's the only thing we'd done before that. but he's a great actor. >> jimmy: was bruce dern in that movie as well? >> he was, actually. >> jimmy: an "astronaut farmer" reunion going on there. >> it really is. i've worked with bruce several. he's been really good to me over the years. >> jimmy: you directed this first episode? >> i did, yes. >> jimmy: what's that like, being the director? you'd not directed any episodes of this particular show before? >> no, i never did. i wasn't really sure i wanted to do it, but they said the first one's the artsy episode, more character based. and i said, yeah, i'll do that. it ended up, you know, being a really nice experience. but i love the season. it's my favorite one. and you hope that the last one will be your favorite one. >> jimmy: you hope so for sure. you know, you mentioned before your band the boxmasters. i know you recorded stuff over covid, a christmas album coming out in novembe. and i wonder, because it seems
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like you do know kind of everybody. do you know ringo starr? because he's going to be here this week. we've never had him on the show before. >> that's very cool. i know paul mccartney. >> jimmy: oh, yes, i've heard of him. [ laughter ] >> yes. played bass in the band. >> jimmy: oh, yeah, the bass guy, yeah. lefty, right? >> my only contact with ringo is, we were recording a song over at a&m studios here down the road. there was a song, an early beatles song, i believe "and i love her." but there was a little thing i read where ringo, instead of using a tambourine or snare drum or anything, he was doing the back beat with a box of matches. and it sounded really cool. and we were cdoing a thing that was a little quieter. >> jimmy: shake it or something? >> no, tapping it. and so i really wanted to know how he got that sound. so i called joe walsh, who's his brother-in-law now. >> jimmy: oh, yeah, right. >> and i said, joe, can you ask
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ringo about the matches? and so joe didn't call me back for, like, three days. we were in the studio. i'm like -- you know. and he finally got back to me and he said, ringo says they're called -- then i interrupted him. i said, why didn't ringo call me? [ laughter ] no, not really. no. but he said, they're this special kind of matches, they're long matches, they were in england in the old days. in other words, they didn't have them around anymore. so i just got the usual matches we get at the store here. and it didn't sound anything like that. >> jimmy: you had the wrong matches. >> i got the wrong matches. it didn't work out. >> jimmy: you didn't get -- you weren't able to recreate it? >> i wasn't. but i do have a connection to ringo now. he told me, "good luck, buddy." [ laughter ] [ applause ] >> jimmy: well, it worked out, i guess. >> yeah. >> jimmy: billy bob thornton. the final season of "goliath" friday on amazon prime video.
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[ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: music from st. vincent is on the way. billy bob said he forgot, it's his daughter bella's 17th birthday, she's a big fan of you, guillermo, she wanted you to wish her a happy birthday.
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so go ahead. >> guillermo: bella? bella, happy birthday, have a wonderful day! >> jimmy: wasn't that great? [ cheers and applause ] there you go. >> guillermo: thank you. i wasn't finished, but it's okay. >> jimmy: no, it was perfect. >> guillermo: all right. >> jimmy: a long time ago in the late 1900s, we watched our next guest come of age on one of the most beloved coming-of-age shows of all. he's now the fully grown executive producer and director of a rebooted "the wonder years," premiering tomorrow night here on abc. please say hello to fred savage. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: how's it going? >> great, how are you? >> jimmy: i'm doing well. by the way, i saw you on the emmys in that sketch you did sunday, you were very funny. >> that was a lot of fun, that was fun to do. [ cheers and applause ] yes, yes, thank you. >> jimmy: we all laughed. we watched it and laughed aloud. >> you never know how is they are going to go over. i was watching with my kids at a
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friend's house. and, you know, they're 15, 13, and 8. and they're all checking twitter, like dad, people are really digging it! they're really liking it! reading the twitter comments, fred savage, i so would. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: really? >> these are my kids. fred savage is my hall pass. i'm like, fantastic. they're mostly from men. [ laughter ] but okay, all right. i'll take it. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: sure. >> i think my wife is still on notice. because, you know. it's coming from all angles, you don't know. >> jimmy: when you're somebody's hall pass, that's no kidding around. >> they so would. having your 13-year-old daughter read that to you -- >> jimmy: is odd. >> special. >> jimmy: yeah, for sure. i think for a lot of us, it's weird that you have a 13-year-old daughter. it is strange. >> it's put me on the list, it's so strange. >> jimmy: how old were you when you were on "the wonder years," when you started?
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>> when i was 11 years old. >> jimmy: 11 years oil. >> the same age as -- i mean, my kids are older than i was, it's crazy. it's crazy to watch that. >> jimmy: so you were at the emmys when you were a kid, right? you were nominated a couple of times. >> i was nominated a couple of times, thank you. [ cheers and applause ] clearly a voter, thanks so much. [ laughter ] appreciate the support. >> jimmy: against adults, right? >> against adults, against adults, which didn't seem fair, they were stronger and bigger than me. i was nominated and i got to present a couple times. >> jimmy: who did you present with? >> i presented one year with carol burnett. >> jimmy: great. [ cheers ] >> right? legend. the other year, carl reiner. >> jimmy: oh my god, wow. >> epic, epic. >> jimmy: do you remember what you did, did you have a thing planned? >> there was a bit, and it's haunted me for years. >> jimmy: oh. >> we rehearsed it. because you go -- you rehearse. he had a note from me, the
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legendary carl reiner, hey, friend, when you get to this part, take a pause. okay, i women. you get there, the emmys, i'm 14. i'm excited. i didn't pause. i just drove right through it. and i felt terrible. because i didn't want carl reiner to be like -- gave me a note, and i'm like, thanks, carl, got it, i'll fly blind on this one. oh my god, what a jerk. i couldn't find him. and i carried it with me forever. i felt so bad. and i'm not kidding, 25 years later i was in a dinner and carl reiner was there. and i went up to him, like, carl. fred. [ laughter ] i reminded him of this thing. i'm like, and i didn't take your note. and he goes, have you been -- this is 25 years. he goes, have you been carrying this all these years? i'm like, i have. he goes, uniyou're absolved! [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank god. >> such a weight. it was such a weight. i can't even tell you. >> jimmy: thank god you got
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absolution before carl passed away. >> thank god, yeah. >> jimmy: well, what a crazy life you've had. >> crazy. >> jimmy: that's just nuts. the last time you were here, you were, as i recall, correct me if i have this wrong, you were training with chef lawsuit tuto well known chef in los angeles, training to cook? >> i was working in the kitchen a little bit. >> jimmy: are you still doing that? >> not anymore. he's moved on to more professionally trained chefs. >> jimmy: he has, okay. >> so i'm, you know -- >> jimmy: did you not pause when he told you to pause? [ laughter ] >> i said, "i got this, man." if i don't listen to carl, i'm not listening to you, luto. i always find new things to try out and do. during the pandemic, i picked up pickleball. >> jimmy: oh, yeah, right. >> i started playing pickleball. i don't know if you are pickleballers? i'm on the ground floor, exciting, i think. [ laughter ] great sport. very low impact. >> jimmy: isn't it mostly for older people? >> mostly seniors, and me, yeah.
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the thing i love is i'm 45, i'm not young to be doing a lot of things. but i got on the pickleball court and they're just amazed at my athleticism. [ laughter ] i'm just, like -- i'm like, incredibly fleet of foot. i can get balls. i can run around. it's awesome. >> jimmy: so you are playing with old people? >> i'm playing with older people, which i really enjoy. but it sometimes bites me.pi wah this guy. i get real competitive, you know? so i'm out there with this guy bob. i'm playing. we were bested, we lost. >> jimmy: how old is bob? >> it's not sure. i'm not sure. [ laughter ] he's pretty old. didn't mean i could get after him. i was like, bob, what happened after that game, what's going on? he's like, i'm coming back from hip surgery. [ laughter ] i'm like, all right. and he goes, now after the surgery, one leg is longer than the other one. [ laughter ] and like, bob, you've got to tell me that before you partner up with me, you've got to be up front. >> jimmy: he did the wrong thing.
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>> you've got to tell, you've got to tell someone, my legs aren't the same length. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: this sounds like a movie or something. >> you know, you've got to be careful. >> jimmy: fred savage is pickle boy, this could be a great thing. >> i was getting aggressive. i was playing with another woman, mary, what's going on? the guys are going, take it easy on mary, she has cataracts, she's losing her vision. [ laughter ] and i was like, can she see at all? they're like, a little bit. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: don knotts pulled same stunt on billy bob, don't buy it. >> it's not cool, just tell me. >> jimmy: this show, "the wonder years," is it correct to call it a reboot? >> a reimagining of the original. >> jimmy: much better, yeah. >> it focuses -- the original is on this family, the arnolds. this is a new family, the williamses. takes place the same year, 1968, focusing on an african-american family in montgomery, alabama. so, you know, it's the same tone as "the wonder years."
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a narrator, this one is don she'd dell. >> jimmy: don cheadle is the narrator, right. [ cheers and applause ] incredible, incredible. he comes in and records a motorcycle helmet, he's so cool. >> jimmy: he doesn't wear it while he's narrating? >> visor up, yeah. visor up. >> jimmy: he's a pro. >> he knows how sound work squls i thought it would be -- i think it would be right if you were to pass the baton to your new young star of "the wonder years." >> e.j. >> jimmy: e.j. is the new one. do you want to go get a baton? >> i brought a backpack full of batons. >> jimmy: great, go get the batons. >> i'll be right back. >> jimmy: let's go to e.j. williams, who is -- e.j., where are you? [ cheers and applause ] how's it going? >> hello, hello. >> jimmy: wow, look at how well dressed you are. e.j., congratulations on the show. >> thank you. appreciate it. it's been fun.
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>> jimmy: had you ever seen it or heard of it before this? >> yes. i'm not going to lie, when i first heard of it, my parents refamiliarized it -- however you say that -- >> jimmy: you better get it together, e.j., this is a big job. [ laughter ] >> yeah. so when my parents -- i knew about it. but then when my parents came to me and were telling me more about it, to expand my knowledge on it, i didn't have to say anything. my parents said, "thanks for making me feel old." [ laughter ] >> jimmy: are you prepared to accept the "wonder years" baton? i don't know if fred went to his car to get it or what happened. [ laughter ] he's gone. are you prepared to accept the baton? >> got it, got it! >> jimmy: there he is. >> got it, got it! >> he's back. >> i'm back. >> jimmy: you had a lot of batons. >> well, i lose things. >> jimmy: give him the blue one. >> okay, all right.
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e.j., you ready, buddy? >> i am. >> jimmy: here we go. this is a major moment. fred savage -- >> so you know, this means you're retiring. >> jimmy: e.j., accept the baton. >> yeah! >> jimmy: i'm just excited i was part of that. [ applause ] e.j. williams, fred savage. "the wonder years" premieres tomorrow night here on abc. thank you, fred. >> my pleasure. >> jimmy: be back with st. vincent! (upbeat pop music throughout) (upbeat pop music throughout)
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♪ oh what a wonderful world ♪ >> dicky: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presented by mercedes-benz. the best or nothing. >> dicky: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presented by mercedes-benz. the best or nothing. >> jimmy: now with the title track from the soundtrack to her movie "the nowhere inn," st. vincent! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ driver, do you mind turn off patsy cline walking on my own tonight hate being impolite ♪
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♪ but no small talk i'm tired just wake me when we arrive ♪ ♪ oh, pick up speed and sandwiches a ziploc bag a fifth of gin ♪ ♪ don't ask me why oh, drop me by the burnout sign where hell is near and ♪ ♪ heaven hides within paradise ♪ ♪ here at the nowhere inn where nothing and no one wins ♪ ♪ where our last days are spent wasted on song and sin here at the nowhere inn ♪ ♪ the hallways are labyrinths where i last sold my myth ♪ ♪ now i live at the nowhere inn ♪
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♪ ♪ ♪ always knew you'd end up here been waiting now for years to see you ♪ ♪ in my everlasting mirror everybody knows your name and knows you are to blame ♪ ♪ for every trickle of your mama's tears ♪ ♪ ♪
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♪ we're all nowhere and where are you now we're all nowhere and where are you now ♪ ♪ you're at the nowhere inn where nothing and no one wins where our last days are spent wasted on song and sin ♪ ♪ i'm here at the nowhere inn the hallways are labyrinths where i sold my last myth ♪ ♪ now i live at the nowhere inn ♪ ♪ we're all nowhere and where are you now we're all nowhere and where are you now ♪
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and where are you now we're all nowhere and where are you ♪ ♪ where are you where are you where are you where are you ♪ ♪ where are you where are you where are you where are you ♪ ♪ where are you where are you where are you ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> dicky: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presented by mercedes-benz. the best or nothing.
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>> jimmy: thanks to billy bob thornton, fred savage, e.j. williams, st. vincent. apologies to matt damon.
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tomorrow night, join us for our special climate night show. "nightline" is next. thanks for watching, enjoy your humidifier. goodnight. this is "nightline." >> tonight, crisis at the border. migrants, mostly haitian -- >> thousands of them, many with children, taking this narrow and treacherous path as cross the rio grande. >> the biden administration already sending thousands back and holding firm. >> if you come to the united states illegally, you will be returned. >> these haunting images reopening new wounds. >> our lives do not matter. our pains do not matter. plus lies and betrayal. >> it's just, he's unavailable. >> someone long distance? someone from work? >> the new series focusing on the women of the clinton scandal, produced by the woman at the center of it all, monica

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