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tv   Piers Morgan Tonight  CNN  January 22, 2011 9:00pm-10:00pm EST

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for them, their sons, there are no second chances. >> that has to be horrifying, to live through something like this, to lose your child, and then to come to this belief that the police got the wrong guys. >> i'm as angry at the police as i was the boys that did it. it's 18 years later, and i still don't know the truth. i don't feel like i know the truth. >> ultimately a judge will decide if the west memphis three deserve new trials. if that happens, then prosecutors will have to start over and again convince juries they are guilty. if they are found innocent, it leaves everyone with a very unsettling question. if the west memphis three didn't kill those little boys out here, then who did? howard stern may think he's
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the king of all media, but i'm the british king of all media. and tonight, i'm the one asking the questions. >> england is the size of philadelphia. i conquered philadelphia in 1980. >> on howard stern! the piers morgan show starring piers morgan. >> look at the butt cheeks on that chick. >> this is piers' night, not mine. i'm just here for fun. >> howard stern, how much of his private parts did he show? >> you've got that certain je ne sais quoi. you've got it. you're on a roll. howard stern, when i first appeared on your show, i remember being dragged into this sort of side dungeon and one of your producers saying, this is how this works. you either appear for five
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minutes or an hour. it depends how interesting howard thinks you are. talk about piling the pressure on. so today, the same rule applies. be good or you're gone. >> first of all, i have no idea what you just said. i'm looking at myself in the monitor and seeing that my hair looks awfully big today. it's a pleasure to be here on your show. >> thank you, howard. >> i want to congratulate you on reseating a 95-year-old man. poor larry king is sitting at home right now pulling what few hairs he has in his head out. i mean, what a nut job. >> you leave larry king alone. >> do you like larry? >> i love larry king. >> i was always amazed that dig dignitaries, presidents, people who have security teams would sit here with this maniac. >> larry king is not a maniac. >> they should have had a reality show with larry. >> you're my second show. i want to have a third show. >> i like you. i like you on "america's got talent." i think you're a terrific judge. i think you're a nice man. but who the hell knows what
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you're going to do on here. they tell me you're a journalist. >> a journalist? >> that's what they tell me. >> i was a journalist for 25 years. >> people in america don't know that. >> they do now. >> what is your background? tell the world. >> i'm doing the interview, howard. it's not your show. i am in charge. >> piers, i want to see you be successful. i wish you a lot of luck. but as i said to your people in there, i said, look, piers was in england. to be successful in england is very nice. but england's the size of philadelphia. to conquer england, it takes about two days. >> let me tell you something, you call yourself the king of all media. >> that's right. >> you don't have have kings in america. you're not allowed to be a king. >> the name king of all media was a goof, obviously. i didn't think i was the king of all media. i wanted to prove a point. it always struck me as fascinating that michael jackson decided to call himself the king of pop. and i said to myself, boy, that's unbelievable. it's obnoxious and pretentious. who's going to buy into that? >> it was also true. >> well, after a while,
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everywhere he was introduced, he was then called king of pop. they didn't say he called himself king of pop. the rolling stones called themselves the world's greatest rock 'n' roll band. i happen to agree with that. but it's pretentious to call yourself that. i said on the radio, i'm going to start -- this is 20 years ago, i'm going to call myself king of media. and then jackie martin said, no, it should be king of all media. i said, okay. and then slowly but surely it was a joke but then slowly but surely it started to become a name that was attributed to me. >> you've never denied being the king of all media. >> i am the king of all media. >> you're the highest paid figure in all media. doesn't that make you the king? >> yeah. the reason i'm the king of all media is i am particularly good as being on the radio, being in broadcasting now my whole life. whatever i say is interesting. i am a fascinating human being. >> that's not true. >> it is. everything i say is interesting. >> like all people in your position, you're one of the best at it.
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but some days you're off your game, you're boring. >> piers, you can say that to be outrageous because you think you're different than larry king. they all tried it. i heard a rumor that you were going to challenge me today, you wanted to be confrontational. you wanted to say that you are the best interviewer in the world. >> i am. >> and that's good. i'm glad you're confident. but, my friend, you have a lot to prove here. we're going to see where these ratings, your report card is going to come in. here's my prediction, in three months, you'll have fired your talent booker. i said to piers, before, i said first week is great. you've had oprah. you have me. you have some interesting people. what is going to happen three months from now when you're interviewing scott baio? really what are you going to do? who is going to care? >> i want to play this clip -- you said this on your show in the last few days. >> they want to announce that i'm going to do this show. but it is piers morgan. [ bleep ] it. >> when is he starting? >> i don't know. i don't know what the big secret is. who gives a [ bleep ]? no one's watching it anyway?
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>> well, it's not on. >> that's what i mean. might as well not be on. >> he's had as many viewers as -- >> piers morgan's coming, whoo-hoo. >> are you going to apologize? >> i want you to be successful. >> you don't want me to be successful. >> i like you. >> but i don't believe you want me to be successful. if they're all talking about me, they're not talking about you. >> i don't see it that way at all. i think that i have a very nice career and that my career will always be here. i've seen them all come and go. i really, truly want you to be successful. i hope you do well. >> what's the secret? you're the master of this. what is the secret of being a long-time, successful entertainer in america? >> i think you have to have a sense of yourself. i think you really have to understand what people want to hear. and by saying that, i think that's something -- not that you're born with, but it's cultivated. i had a father and mother who would cut me off the second i went too long. if i started to talk, they'd say, you're boring everybody. this is a horrible story.
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then when i got it right and i would do an impression of their friends and i had the whole room laughing, there's terrible pressure on me. this is the way i won love and acceptance from my parents. but it was the best training ground in the world. in a sense, i've always been doing a radio show to get approval. >> i struck out on twitter today. give me a killer question for howard today. one of the questions on twitter today, if you've got the money that you made, the success you've enjoyed, the status and everything that comes with it, what would motivate you to get out of bed at 3:30, 4:00 every day to carry on doing this? >> i don't know. i came to a conclusion because my contract was up a few months ago. and i really thought i was going to retire. i said, why am i doing this anymore? i've proven everything i need to prove. my show has been successful. i went to satellite. we started with 600,000 people there. now we're over 20 million. i feel like we hit a home run. when i say we, i mean the whole
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show, robin and fred and gary. all the people i work with. i said to myself, why am i doing this anymore? it makes me crazy. i hate getting up early in the morning. and i don't particularly like doing the show. i am driven by a neurotic compulsion to do that show. and it doesn't seem enjoyable. i go home every night and say, i didn't get it right, i didn't do it right, i did a horrible job, the show was horrible. >> how much of that comes from that early experience with your parents? i read about you watching your father praising people that he really respected and you craving that praise. and you've touched on that. there was a key part of your early life was this need to please your parents. do you still feel that -- do they listen to the show? >> my parents listen every day. i don't think my father listened to me growing up. when i say listen, don't think we had a relationship where he sat and he said, how are you doing son, what is happening? the thing i used to see my father doing when we were driving into the city, my father was a radio engineer. and he would turn on that radio
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and he would shush me. and my father had such reverence for people with a microphone that it stopped me in my tracks. it is all i wanted. i wanted my father to hear me. >> how often does he say to you, great show, howard? >> rarely. he said to me some years ago, and this really moved me. he said, you're a genius. and i was rocked because i never thought i'd hear those words. i didn't think i was ever going to earn that respect in my father's eyes. >> what had you done to earn it? was there a particular -- >> i think it was after my movie, it was after many accomplishments. and i think in many ways with my career, i was searching for that approval from my father. and it's a very empty search, actually, because when you get it, it's almost too late. it's like, oh, you mean this is what this was all for?
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>> if that's been your struggle, to earn your father's approval and he finally says, howard, you're a genius, and many people would agree with him, when you've reached that pinnacle, i come back to, what's the drive now? once your dad's called you a genius, you've had all the success and the money, what makes you at 4:00 in the morning, when everyone else is asleep say, getting out of bed, and i'm going into battle on this show that often drives me crazy, i'm not even sure i enjoy it? >> i think it's my identity, i think it's my ego. it's also something that -- >> insecurity? >> oh, absolutely. >> but about what? about losing your place in -- >> my mojo, this is who i am, this is what i do. there's no better feeling to me when i walk in some place and i go, oh, my god, did you hear what camille grammer said on your show today. she was implying that kelsey grammer likes to dress like a woman. i feel like a hit a home run,
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like i'm babe ruth, i did a great show or made people laugh. but more importantly i think for me, i should admit this at some point to myself that i actually really enjoy t. as much as it drives me crazy, and my career has driven me crazy. i was so neurotic about my career, when i was in detroit, it was 1980. and i only wanted to succeed. i went to detroit. there were four rock stations there. we were the bottom of the barrel. we didn't have a one rating at this one radio station. and the station was horrible. in a horrible location. everything was bad about it. and i was alone in detroit. my wife hadn't moved there at the time. and i was living in a hotel. i would tape my show. i'd go back to the hotel, listen to the show and then i would sit in the room, i wouldn't leave it. i never socialized. i never went out to dinner. i would sit and wait for the next show. i was insane. i would wait and think about the next show. i only wanted to be successful on the radio.
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and not being successful in detroit tore me apart. i became distraught, really, because i put so much energy into it. and then i just sort of had an epiphany and i said, i think i know what i need to do now. i've worked this out. i went to washington and the show took off and was very successful. and one of the things that i knew that i needed in the show was someone to play off who was really great with me. and that was robin. i got lucky and got her. so this career has been neurotic. and what i've put into it and what i've really tried to cultivate with it -- >> talking about the things you've cultivated, we're going to take a little break and when we come back, i want to talk to you about the three things i believe you care about most -- sex, sex and sex. >> you are a sexy man. what's going on with you? really?
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>> piers, it's suzy-o here. i can't wait till we go one-on-one. good luck to you, big boy. you're going to do great. without taking pills around the clock? try thermacare heatwraps, for all day relief without pills. i was surprised, thermacare worked all day. you feel the heat. and it relaxes and unlocks the muscle. you've got to try it. [ man ] thermacare, more effective for back pain than the maximum dose of acetaminophen, the medicine in tylenol. go to today for a $3 off coupon. thermacare. no pills. no pain. just relief. i worry about my son playing football. which is why i'm really excited. because toyota developed this software that can simulate head injuries in an accident and helps make people safer. then they shared this technology with researchers at wake forest to help reduce head injuries on the football field. so, you know, i can feel a bit better about my son playing football. [ male announcer ] how would you use toyota technology to make a better world? learn how to share your ideas
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to stay fit,t us online you might also want to try lifting one of these. a unique sea salt added to over 40 campbell's condensed soups. helps us reduce sodium, but not flavor. so do a few lifts. campbell's.® it's amazing what soup can do.™ try capzasin-hp. it penetrates deep to block pain signals for hours of relief. capzasin-hp. take the pain out of arthritis. this is the greatest. everything's coming -- >> howard, nobody knows what's going on here. i think a bra has come off. >> a bra just came off. >> and it's on his head. >> howard, the significance of that moment in broadcasting history is it was 1984 and that
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was the first naked woman you brought into your studio. >> i think about how absurd that is. i remember -- >> naked woman on a radio is like taking a camel to an oasis and he can't drink. >> it was silly. what was silly about it was i was at nbc at the time and nbc -- management hated me. they wanted to get rid of me. they were actively plotting to get rid of me. they just wanted to do it in a way that they didn't have to pay me the rest of my life. when i went there, it was a battle. the whole career has been a battle. but it occurred to me that to have a naked woman on the radio would be outrageous and yet really who would it offend? it's all theater of the mind. you don't even really know if she's naked or not. i wanted to see a naked woman. >> of course. there you are looking at these naked women having a great time -- tormenting your listeners who are listening to you watching a woman taking her clothes off. >> but that wasn't what it was about for me. interviewing somebody who's naked, to me, the fascinating thing was that somebody in the audience had that need to be
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naked. and people have said our show was the introduction of reality television because really what i was saying is, it's not about her being naked, it's that somebody would even want to come down to my studio and be naked and be seen in this way. it has to be something more to this? why are you down here in the first place and what do your parents think of this and what's going on anyway? no, i liked it. i had many bits where i was hands-on for many years. but i'm older and wiser now. >> are you sex mad? >> i'm fascinated by sex. i'm fascinated by the fact that it's so taboo. i found it fascinating that the government would go after me. when we saw every day that priests were molesting young boys and all that this stuff and scandals in our world and the wars. and the one thing in our country that everyone was freaking out about was this howard stern and talking about sex on the radio. to me, i always thought the most interesting, sort of edgy radio
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was pissing everyone off. and this pissed everyone off. sex, oh, my god, he's talking about sex. >> when i was in school, the guys talking about it the most were getting it the least. that's why they were so obsessed. >> and i wasn't getting it at all. so i was thrilled. all of a sudden i'm a guy, i never got a lot of attention from women. all of a sudden i started to get popular, i was on the radio, people wanted to take their clothing off in front of me. this is really true. i went out with a bunch of friends one night for dinner and they were shocked. we went to dinner -- i'm not on the radio. i'm out to dinner. and three women came up to our table and said, howard, would you like to see our breasts? and my friends are sitting there like -- and i'm thinking, okay, this is not a big deal to me. and there they right in the restaurant, they pulled their top down, the restaurant asked them to stop. we walked outside, all my friends came and these women wanted to show me their breasts. >> what did you say to them? >> i said, they're beautiful.
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and you know what, it's so stupid, the whole thing -- >> then what happens? >> nothing happened. my friends were thrilled. >> three women standing in the restaurant with their breasts out, you're saying they're beautiful -- >> that's it. >> the normal process -- >> they were there with their boyfriends. >> what? >> it wasn't a sexual thing for them. they just wanted to show it to me. >> how did the boyfriends feel? >> they seemed to be proud to show -- >> what if my wife went up to you in a restaurant and said, howard, look at my breasts, i would be absolutely horrified. >> i would do appearances at record stores and this was the amazing power of radio and what i was doing, i walk in and this beautiful woman comes up to me with her boyfriend and says, howard, do you want my girlfriend? i said, what do you mean? he says, do you want to have sex with my girlfriend? you're the only guy i would allow this. and of course i was married at the time. the answer was no for me.
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but i never cheated. so it was like the kind of thing -- >> you never cheated? >> no. >> always been faithful? >> i've been faithful. >> really? >> yeah. why are you shocked by that? >> it's a kind of contradiction. unlike most of celebrities who preach this squeaky clean persona about themselves, go home and take drugs and sleep around, you're the complete opposite. you talk this great game about wild nights out and strippers and drugs and you go home and you're a domesticated little pussy cat. >> no. i don't like to go out. i don't like to stay out. i like to be at home. i'm fascinated by human behavior. and i love talking to people and i love getting to the bottom of things. i had ron howard on the show today. and we spent ten minutes on the fact that don knotts was a ladies' man. and i only wanted to know the size of his penis. i'm not gay, but i thought it would be interesting to know if
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don knotts -- >> but you've always maintained that, and i think i'm quoting correctly, that you're hung like a raisin. >> i am. >> if you're always saying you're hung like a raisin, you mean i'm hung like -- >> i mean i'm hung like a raisin. >> are you really? >> yes. >> i would show you but i'm embarrassed. >> would you say physically impaired? >> no. you want to get into this -- >> i do. >> i don't know how much of this you can air because cnn is a little uptight. >> let's try it. >> when i'm aroused, i'm what they'd call average, six inches. how many inches are you? >> i'm not getting into that. i'm interviewing you. have you ever taken viagra? >> never. >> never tried it? >> i don't need it. i'm 57 and i'm fully aroused. >> have you ever taken any drug? >> oh, yeah, i've had a history with drugs. i never was a drug addict, i don't think. i don't think you classify me as one but i experimented a lot when i was younger.
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i think i was very unhappy. i've told my audience over and over again that i had a terrible experience that i wrote about in my book with lsd when i was younger. and i didn't understand. there's no direction on the acid that you buy. and i bought a four-way hit and took the whole thing. and i almost lost my mind. it was the most horrible, worst experience of my life. and i've been a big advocate of saying on the air, i'm for the total legalization of drugs. i think it's ridiculous to try to monitor that. >> even though you went through that kind of experience -- >> but for myself, i do not -- >> as a father, do you actually believe in legalizing drugs as a father? >> i do. >> would you like your kids to have free access to legal drugs? >> i think my kids are very strong, they have their heads together. >> but your kids are lucky if they're strong. a lot of kids aren't. >> they aren't. but i think that almost the illegal factor makes it more enchanting. it did for me. i thought it was sort of cool, sort of taboo, i'm going into
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this world that's off limits to adults. i had all these fantasies about it. quite frankly, there are so many people hopped up on regular drugs out there, pharmaceutical drugs that it hardly makes a difference at this point. everyone's high on something. i think a show like mine is actually healthy because when kids do listen to it, i can say to them, this didn't work for me, here's why, i tried it and almost lost my mind doing it. >> i'm going to come back with the only drug you really seem to really delight in partaking in is the drug of love with your wife. >> i'm in love with my wife. i'm in love with you.
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is this supposed to be some kind of in-depth profile revealing you in ways you've never been revealed before? >> i doubt he's going to get that because first he goes, can
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i interview you at your house? no. can i talk to beth? no. you'll talk to me. >> howard, i want to show you a charming picture. >> good. >> of a happily married couple. there is your beautiful wife, beth. >> that is my wedding. yes. >> what are you thoughts when you look at that picture? >> well, beth is my best friend. and, you know, honestly, i'm having a blast in my marriage. i am so happily married. i adore her. this is my wedding ring. i put a "b" on my finger. that's real marriage. you just have a dopey ring. where is your wife? >> my wife's not here, luckily. the problem with having a "b" tattooed on your finger is you have to remain married now to "b" for the rest of your life. >> if i get divorced, you just say, oh, that was for bitch because my marriage was a bitch. there's always a way to creatively work around that.
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are you nervous about three months down the road? >> no, no. you should be. the king of all media is a big title. muhammad ali, eventually someone comes along and knocks you out. >> it hasn't happened in 30 years. >> but you're no spring chicken. >> i'm getting older. that's true. i'm hoping to get out before anybody knocks me out. >> that's true. >> are you worried? >> about what? >> this interview is doing pretty well. you're thinking, hang on a sec, this could be a problem. >> i don't think you got anything out of me. what, that i have a small penis? everybody knew that. come on, piers, let's go. open me up, baby. what else do you want to know. hey, let me promote something. i just want to mention that i am on sirius satellite radio and our show is now on the sirius app. people were complaining they couldn't carry us with -- >> how much was your new five-year deal worth? >> listen, i've never released financial deals although i read in the paper how much i'm worth every day. they never had it right. they said i took a pay cut. i never took a pay cut. >> you didn't? >> i never took a pay cut. i adjusted my hours.
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>> more or less? >> i'm going to be doing less hours. >> less hours for the same money or more money -- >> i'm not saying how much money. they've asked me not to say that. >> more or less than the last deal, as a salary? >> i would say it's about the same. i would say it's about the same, maybe a little more. >> a little more for a little less work? >> that's right. >> it was a better deal for you? >> a better deal. >> when you announced the deal, the stock price went up by 20%, presuming you have stock? >> i do have stock. >> you made another skinful of cash -- >> no, the stock hasn't made enough for me to make any cash. i'm hoping a lot of people go out and buy that stock. and we can all make some cash, but who knows. >> let's talk about the second deal. the second deal is confidential. but the first deal it was rumored to be $500 million. >> what happened was there was a lot of speculation. i never went out and said how much money i was making. but at the time it occurred to me that i did not want to be on
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regular radio anymore, so-called terrestrial radio. the fcc was pounding me. i didn't feel like the show was funny anymore because they were editing it like crazy. >> they were restricting you too much with the fines? >> they were driving me insane. and i'd always been keeping my eye on the technology on satellite radio and this looked like my way out. they said, it would be just great if you came over. and it cost money for me to come over. but i will tell you this, as much money as they paid me, i paid every dime back and then some. >> no one's disputing that everyone else gets a rate too. i'm curious why someone so open as you is reticent, especially since you're a bit of a show-off -- >> i'm very uncomfortable about money, i'm uncomfortable about talking about it, i think that -- >> you don't dispute being worth hundreds of millions, maybe even a billion dollars. are you worth a billion? >> no. i'm not worth anywhere near what they prescript in the paper.
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>> are you worth a quarter of oprah? >> oprah is worth way more money than i am. >> does that annoy you that the queen of all media is worth more than you? >> yeah. oprah was in syndication and she took chances and i admire that. i do admire that about oprah. i don't know why, it somehow bothers me that her career has been based on taking phil donahue's format and doing a retread. but that's okay. she's brilliant at it and people love her. and she deserves every penny. performers deserve to be paid if they have the audience. nobody's doing charity here. >> jay leno said about you when you made that call to move off terrestrial radio, now you don't really hear about howard stern and that was a big mistake to come off mainstream. >> jay is insane and jay is a crook. the whole world knows exactly what he's up to. he steals a tremendous amount of material. he's not fit to scrub david letterman's feet. i don't know why he's beaten david letterman in the ratings. it's beyond my comprehension. america must be filled with morons who at night lay in bed -- the ones who are watching
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him must be in a coma. >> what did you think of what he did to conan o'brien? >> he did a terrible thing to conan o'brien. >> wasn't it just business, really? >> no, it wasn't business at all. it is such a complicated -- did you ever read bill carter's book on it? read that and figure it out for yourself. >> as a professional entertainer, isn't it the rule of the jungle if your ratings aren't doing great -- >> of course. >> someone else comes along. >> but he had made certain guarantees to conan, saying this is your show. if i was jay leno, i would have manned up and said, listen, conan, you think you're so good, i'm going to go to fox network or go to abc and i'm going to put my show on and i'm going to kick your ass. that's what a man does. you don't sort of weasel your way back in by saying, i'm going to do 11:30, does conan have a problem with that? conan said, yeah, i do have a problem with that. didn't matter. jay took it anyway. >> you're number one in what you do. how would you have felt? >> i don't like jay personally. jay is one of the greatest stand-up comics in my opinion when he was younger.
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but i do not like how he's behaved with me personally. i've done his show many times in the past. i won't do it again. i've let go of all of that even though i'm ranting and raving like a lunatic for your show. as far as oprah goes, i'm happy oprah makes a living. >> who do you most admire in your business? >> well, letterman being one of them. i like jimmy kimmel a lot. >> why letterman? what makes him, to you -- >> letterman was an original. letterman came on there, he was a breath of fresh air. he was able to do new types of bits. even the format of his show, even the way he would do his monologue, walk to his desk, which you wouldn't see him walk to his desk, everything has been imitated now. he would shoot a thing at the camera, now everybody shoots a thing at the camera. there were things that dave did that were very innovative and so i believe he's an original. i see when dave does something, the other guys have to follow. so i admire him greatly. >> we need a break now.
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we both need a break now. >> i need a break. i need a break from you, piers. >> i know. >> when is this show going off the air? >> probably the moment this show finishes. >> i think this is it. ♪ ♪ work, work all week long ♪ punching that clock from dusk till dawn ♪ ♪ countin' the days till friday night ♪ ♪ that's when all the conditions are right for a good time ♪ [ male announcer ] advanced technology that helps provide cleaner air, cleaner water, and helps make all of us more energy efficient is something the whole world can get in step with. [ static ] ♪ i need a good time [ male announcer ] ecomagination from ge. it's technology that makes the world work. ♪
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piers morgan show starring piers morgan. >> howard, i was told that one of the reasons why you were a little bit late arriving in the studio today was because of the hair issue, that we had gel, we had pomade, whatever that is, we had spray, there was a flotilla of people around you, perfecting this beautifully crafted bouffant.
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>> this look is very, very complicated. listen, i am not a handsome man, as we can see. so in order to look -- >> rugged. >> i'm a rugged man. in order to put this look together, in order to get the appropriate look, it takes hours. >> is it real, that hair? >> the hair is real and i don't color it -- don't get too frisky. >> if i give it a good yank -- >> it wouldn't all fall out. i have my own hair. >> and you dye it, obviously? >> i do not color it. i have some gray in it. i'm very blessed. >> look me in the eye and repeat that. >> i swear on a stack of bibles that i don't color my hair. >> really? >> yeah. >> you're 57 and you have a naturally pretty dark, curly big bouffant? >> yes, i'm very lucky. >> does it make you feel virile? >> i am virile. >> are you romantic? >> i think so. what i've learned after all these years -- and i'm in therapy. it's really helped me. that's where i was before i came to see you. i've learned it can't be about me all the time and in order to have a successful marriage,
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somehow i have to learn to also make it about my wife and to put her first and to try to address what she's saying and listen to her. and i think i'm being a good husband. i'm trying very hard. >> every woman i talked to about you was curious about the same thing, given your on-air brand. is he good in bed? >> well, you know, that's a tough one. some women have said, yes. >> how many have said, no? >> well, listen, here's the sad part, before you become famous is the real test of how you are in bed. i've had women cry. >> with happiness or despair? >> no, despair. the first time i did it, the woman said, i really think this is a bad idea. she said, you know why, she said i know that for a guy you're always going to remember the first woman you made love to. and i don't want to be stuck in your head all those years. so it was not a good start. but as time went on, god bless the porno industry.
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i learned from watching these pornos. do you watch porno -- >> i was going to ask you about this. you bang a lot about the glory of porno. but i come back to you're a family guy. you've got kids. they're going to be exposed to all this stuff. what's your real view? >> my real view is this, it's a sad day -- i interview many porno stars and i'm fascinated by their lives. i say their parents must be out of their minds. and you get all kinds of strange reactions. you get, my parents are my best friends, they support me in the business. and then you get the opposite reaction, i come from a very religious family. and then you get this other kind of wacky answer. and that's what i'm after. i think that's what's interesting about the show. sitting and interviewing another naked porno star would not be interesting. the show would have been off the air. >> do you ever feel -- i'm going to play you a clip of the david arquette moment which is the stuff of legend. and we'll come back after that -- i want to ask you one thing when you ask this afterwards -- whether you ever feel guilty when this kind of
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thing happens spontaneously? >> sure. >> we get a trial separation. we have agreements with it. she knows she's not [ bleep ] me and she's like, listen, i want you to be able to do whatever you have to do. essentially free to see people. >> i mean, listen, from a journalistic point of view, fantastic. this major star rings up and he pour his heart out, he's clearly under the influence of alcohol and it's riveting radio. but when you actually go home and you think about it, are you proud of that kind of moment or do you feel uneasy? >> first of all, david is a friend of mine. and has been on my show many times. so that was the history. that's why he felt comfortable calling in. he's actually spent a whole day on the show. he just kind of hangs out with us. and i like david very much. and i'm really upset for him because he really is hurting about his wife. i don't think he would mind me saying that. there's a part of me that said, yeah, i hope this doesn't backfire on david.
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but i just kind of get caught up in the fact that i was genuinely interested in what was going on in his life. but you do sometimes wonder, gee, what is going to be the implication. but david is a grown man. david was not intoxicated when he did that interview. he was just bummed out and he was upset. but he was not intoxicated. i think he was saying something really beautiful. he came on because there were reports in the newspaper that were saying that david was cheating on his wife and that's what broke things up. people picked up what he said there and blew it up to make it look kind of ugly. and he became the cheating husband again. it completely backfired. but his intent was good. to answer your question, no, i didn't feel guilty. >> as his friend when it backfired, did you feel uneasy about that? >> i wrote him an e-mail and said, i don't like what's going on here. i'm getting upset about it. and he said, i'm not, i feel comfortable on what i said. and i checked in on him as a friend to see if he was okay. listen, when you're doing a radio show and you invite people
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on, anything i said here today, jay leno might be upset with what i said today. i'm willing to accept responsibility. do you feel bad that you had me on your show -- >> no, of course not. the more outrageous the better. >> right. i mean, why not? and david felt most comfortable talking to me. and that's what i'm proud of. and i'm also proud of the fact that i'm the type of broadcaster where when you come on my show, people tell me they forget they're on the radio. and to me, that's a good sign. i'm doing something right. so, no, i don't feel guilty about what i do. i'm proud of what i do. >> let's take another break. when we come back, i want to know what you think about the state of america and about barack obama. >> okay. ♪
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about 15 years ago, you nearly ran -- you did start to run as governor of new york. then you didn't take it any further. a lot of people say to me, howard stern would be a real maverick politician. i wish he would stand again at some high level. >> i would be an awful politician because i polarize so many people. there's a lot of people out there who just, whatever their impressions are of me, i would not be good. but the odd thing about running for governor, it was something where i just got on the air and said, i'm going to run for governor. i'm going to get a really good lieutenant governor. i'm going to accomplish three things and after i accomplish those three things, i'll resign
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and let this real guy run the thing. and it caught on in a weird way. and we were going up in the polls. >> you meant it as a bit of a joke -- >> yeah, i started to believe it. i won the nomination of the libertarian party and it was crazy. that's a whole show in itself. it was real politics. i had to win the nomination, got it. we were about 28% in the polls. it was a three-way race between myself at the time, governor cuomo, pataki and myself. i was going up in the polls. i still believe to this day i would have won in a three-way race. >> but you pulled out. >> i pulled out. pataki won. >> are you tempted to go again? >> no. i would never -- i can't even understand how anyone does it now. as i've matured -- >> what i hear on your shows, a lot of it is great fun and great banter. you're incredibly smart, you have a great quick wit, you have a great sense on what american
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culture is about, about what real people care about. that's your gift is your instinct for knowing what people care about. these are the credentials for what i would call the modern politician. >> but you have to have a love of service. i'm not one of these people who gets on the radio and knocks a lot of senators. i think there are a lot of good senators out there. i hear them speak and i'm proud to be from this country and there are a lot of good politicians out there. and i wouldn't run for office because i'm not serious enough about helping people -- >> when i hear you speak like this, i think you are serious enough. >> i'm serious about the fact that -- >> you inflect it with humor -- but you are a serious guy, underneath it. >> when you have guys over in afghanistan and iraq, you need serious people who are going to -- i don't want to see guys on endless vacations. i want to see politicians taking their jobs seriously. bill clinton was a great president. why was he a great president? because he was into the job. this guy was on the job all the time. he loved it. he lived it. he breathed it. before he got you in a war, he made sure he thought things through. i was a big backer of hillary clinton.
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i think she would have been the same way. >> what do you think of america right now? what do you think it has come to? >> i think america is the greatest country in the world. i don't just say that -- i love this country. i hate leaving this country. i just went to the turks and caicos. i want to go hang myself. they had so many ants over there, i was going to throw up. i get ants. paying a couple grand a day. i love americans. i love america. i love our freedom and nowhere could a guy like me, an shlub like me have -- they don't allow this anywhere. >> the show after the day of martin luther king day and you have the most powerful man and woman in america will be african-american with obama and robin. >> i didn't create you. >> it was controversial. you made a big deal of this. it is actually a very symbolic
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thing that the president now is barack obama, african-american. >> it's almost ridiculous to say i look robin on who happens to be a black woman. people say is that calculated? i couldn't care what color she was. i was desperate. i needed somebody fantastic on the radio. who had a fabulous laugh and got my humor, knew when to back off and let me roll and when to come in and save me. and that was robin. i never could -- in fact, i met robin over the phone. i didn't know she was black. the program director said let me hear you talk. we talked. it was effortless. that's -- that's robin. so this whole idea that, you know, robin, black woman, you know, it's brilliant. then talk about black people. i'm not that calculated. i needed a real good partner. >> i want to talk about justin bieber, miley cyrus and whether i was right to ban the donald from this show. >> okay.
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howard, i banned madonna for life for this show. what's your view of me doing that? >> i thought it was a particularly good move. particularly, she's not doing your show. most people in show business won't do your show. >> you are. >> i like "america's got
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talent." i love when you hit the buzzer. you are the only good job. i love sharon, known her for years. she wants to be everyone's friend. the guy to worry about is hasselhoff. >> he's left "america's got talent" and took over for me. >> that's nothing. >> -- >> honestly sit here and tell me you don't know why he left? >> no. i'm not going to tell you. >> he left for a personal reason? >> i won't tell you. >> tell me. >> it's not your interview. >> how big is your we nis? >> bigger than yours. >> big deal. nothing to brag about. i love you on "america's got talent". >> thank you. you're a deejay. when you see my lus cyprus, justin bieber, what do you think? >> i love watching my lus cyrus grow up and then take her clothes off. i like her. i like lay dy gaga.
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i like their songs. i'm into some miley cyrus. i was looking at the videos. >> whoa! >> i liked it. but current music scene, you know, listen. i was a disk jockey for many years. i played records. i hated playing the records. it was insane. i was neurotic about it. running out, my hands would shake to get the next record on. they wanted a perfect segue, i hated that aspect of my career, playing records. but i love music. i'm a real fan of david bowie and crosby, stills and nash. the beatles. >> interesting? >> part of, you know -- >> do you worry about getting snoeld. >> no, i don't. i'm feeling really good. i would like to stay like about this age. you know, i'm very happy right now. >> you mentioned 80 and happy? >> i don't know. it's weird. my parents are in their 80s now. my mother says it's really kind of depressing. all of her friends have died and
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she's, you know, they're in great health, my parents. but what she sees going on around her getting her sad. >> what's been the moment in your life which if you had five minutes to live you would have again? >> oh! >> if you could. >> well, hmm. you know, this sounds corny but it's the truth. i adore my children and having my children was an amazing time of my life. that was pretty spectacular. and, you know, in terms of my career, making the film "private parts" was unbelievably satisfying. i wrote the book and never expected that it would be made into a movie. and lo and behold, they bought the movie rights. i got to work with betty thomas and i loved acting and putting that story out there. and i feel it's a great accomplishment. i liked writing the books, i liked the movie. those were real, big highlights. >> also a moment you said earlier your father suddenly worked out, you know, howard,
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you have done good, actually. you are a genius. you have realized -- hard work come to fruition. >> my father and i don't have those kinds of conversations. >> did he tell you he loves you? >> yeah. he does now. i think my father always loved me and not say, howard, i love you. i would badger him on the radio. daddy, say you love me. say you love me. finally, he broke down. and now he says it regularly. i think it makes him feel good. i love my parents very much. piers, time for another plug. i was very lax plugging sirius radio and there's howard tv on demand. >> good thing you mentioned it. you're the same little plugger. >> what do you think, i'm here for my health? piers, you are nice but i want the plug. sirius xm app and don't cut this out. one thing about larry, it was live. don't cut out the plugs. >> you can have your plug.


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